


and then they were roommates

by aroterano



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Lapis Lazuli Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rating May Change, Self-Harm, Slice of Life, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Tags May Change, Underage Drinking, Warnings May Change, i stand for flustered peridot, i suck at angst, its just going to turn into a weird kind of fluff, lapis is just a big flirt, peridot gets flustered at everything, sooo much fluff i cant, top lapis top lapis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:34:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 33,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24059065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aroterano/pseuds/aroterano
Summary: Bored with nothing to do, Peridot pulled out her laptop and controller.After a few minutes, Lapis looked over to Peridot. “Are you playingOverwatch?”Peridot looked up at her and started blushing. “N-no!”“Aw, you’re cute when you’re flustered.”Peridot felt herself blushing harder. “Shut up, Lazuli.”Lapis smirked but stopped talking to her. Peridot continued to playOverwatch, trying to ignore the various looks her roommate gave her.orPeridot's worried about her friend/roommate's deteriorating mental health but is kind of distracted by her blue eyes.
Relationships: Lapis Lazuli/Peridot (Steven Universe)
Comments: 51
Kudos: 157





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Peridot's first day at Beach City University.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> get ready for a whole lot of slow burn

Antsy.

Antsy and very uncomfortable.

That summed up what Peridot was feeling as she walked out of the bright blue bus that had escorted her outside a medium-sized building.

Pushing through the crowd of people, she attempted to find the front of Beach City University. Even though she was a generally outspoken and loud person, crowds had always made her a little nervous, even if it was a small one, like the one outside BCU. She wouldn’t say she despised talking to people; she just wasn’t very good at it. Peridot normally rambled on about a topic very passionately, and everything that came out of her mouth was straightforward, frank, and to the point. She didn’t _mean_ to hurt other people’s feelings. It just...happened.

Peridot grunted as she bumped into a Latino girl with lilac hair. “Sorry,” she mumbled, moving along.

Peridot gave a sigh of relief when she reached the front of the university’s door. She turned around for a moment, and caught the lavender-haired girl from earlier looking at her.

“Er…” Peridot blushed. She decided to ignore her staring. Instead, the college student pushed open the door and entered the building. 

At the front, behind a desk, sat a man with what looked like a permanent frown on his face. He was talking to a stout, middle-aged woman with pale blonde hair up to her shoulders. Peridot saw the woman shrug while the man got up. As the university student walked up to the desk, the woman sat down.

“Hi!” the woman said, her voice bubbly. Peridot eyed her carefully.

“Hello, uh, can I have my key and room number? Peridot Diam—”

“Wait,” the woman stopped her, putting a hand in front of her. “I just deliver mail!” she laughed. “Mr. Frowney’s gone to the bathroom. He’s the one you’re looking for, I assume.”

_Mr. Frowney?_ Peridot thought to herself. _What kind of name is that?_

“I’m Barb Miller!” the woman greeted, grinning and putting her hand out. Peridot reluctantly shook it.

“Peridot.”

“Ooh, another gem name! They’re going around, aren’t they?”

Peridot almost cringed at the woman’s attempt to make small talk. “Yes, I guess they are,” she replied hastily. “Any chance _you_ could give me my key and room number?”

Barb frowned. “Well, I’m not really...here, why don’t you find yourself,” she answered, pushing a logbook towards Peridot. “Just tell me the room number and I’ll give you the key.”

“Uh, sure,” Peridot said skeptically. She pushed her wire-framed glasses up her nose and began to read the names off the list of students. There weren’t too many.

Soon enough, Peridot found her name. “Room C12,” Peridot half-heartedly called at the mail-carrier. 

Barb found the keys faster than Peridot expected. Thanking her, Peridot turned around quickly. All she saw was a flash of tan skin and blue before she crashed into someone.

Peridot looked up to see a deadpan face. A girl with choppy, unruly hair, dyed blue, was looking down at her. Peridot could see the dark brown roots, but most of the girl’s hair was covered by a black beanie.

“Hey,” the girl said nonchalantly. Her hair, which was almost up to her shoulders, swayed.

Peridot felt her cheeks flush. “S-sorry about that.”

The girl snorted and walked up to the desk. Peridot adjusted the strap on her bag and stormed towards her dorm.

Peridot found her dorm quickly enough. The key slid in perfectly. She chose the left bed and stuffed her bag under it. Being the minimalist she was, Peridot was quickly able to set up her side of the dorm. After she was done setting her alarm and adding green sheets to her bed, Peridot looked around her new, temporary home.

A desk was shoved into the corner of the room, closer to her bed. Other than that, the beds, a chest on the opposite side of the desk, and the single NASA poster Peridot had put up, the room was bare. Peridot was certain that her new roommate, whoever it was, hadn’t come in yet.

Peridot sighed and collapsed on to her bed. She felt her wild blonde hair getting pushed everywhere by her pillow, which had little green aliens on it.

Suddenly, she heard a sound. Her stomach.

The scrawny blonde stood up and decided to get something to eat. As she stumbled out the door, she debated between going to the pizza place she passed or the donut shop. In the end, she went for the donut shop, deciding that coffee would wake her up. Not that she wasn’t already jittery.

As Peridot walked down the hallway, she caught sight of the blue-haired girl from before through the corner of her eyes. The blonde felt her hands curl up into fists and she started walking faster.

_Her dorm is in the same hallway as mine?_ She thought as she turned to another hallway. _As if bumping into her hadn’t been embarrassing enough! Now I’ll probably see her everyday!_

Peridot walked outside, and immediately the sun hit her face. She winced, squeezing her eyes shut, while she tried to find someone who knew their way around here.

Peridot saw the lilac-haired girl from earlier. The girl looked fairly confident, so Peridot strided up to her.

“Er, excuse me?”

The girl turned around quickly.

“Can you tell me where the donut shop is?”

The girl’s face brightened up. “Oh, yeah! I was heading to the Big Donut anyway. I was just waiting for someone…but I guess I could show you the way. Just a sec,” she replied, pulling out her phone at the last remark. “What’s your name, by the way?”

“Peridot.”

“...Like the gem?”

Peridot glared at her. “Yes, like the gem.”

“No, no, it’s nothing like that…I’m Amethyst.”

“Oh.”

“C’mon!” Amethyst said, grabbing Peridot’s wrist.

“Hey, wait!”

Amethyst snickered and kept walking. Peridot followed her. They rounded a corner and reached a small building. Peridot heard a _ping!_ from Amethyst’s phone. She checked it quickly and grinned. “They’re already here!”

“They…?”

“My friends! You’ll love them!”

“Sure…” Peridot muttered. This girl that she had known for less than three minutes seemed to know a lot about her. Nevertheless, Amethyst seemed nice.

Amethyst pulled Peridot into the Big Donut. Sitting in the corner were three people: a tall, lanky woman with light, peach hair, a thickset yet tall woman with tied up rainbow hair, and an even taller cryptic-looking woman, with poofy black hair and sunglasses.

_Sunglasses? Indoors?_

“They’re all tall,” Peridot noted dubiously.

“We shorties have to stick together, right?” Amethyst laughed.

Peridot looked at her shoes. Height wasn’t really her thing.

Amethyst grabbed Peridot’s wrist again and pulled her towards her friends.

“Hey, Ame,” the girl with rainbow hair greeted. “Who’s this?”

“I’m Peridot,” said girl intervened before Amethyst could say anything.

“What major are you taking?” the peach-haired one asked.

“Pe-arl!” Amethyst whined. “No one asks that right away!”

“No, it’s fine,” Peridot mumbled. _Pearl? Did_ everyone _here have gem names?_

“I’m majoring in mechanical engineering.” Peridot saw Amethyst sit down and pat the seat next to her. Hesitantly, Peridot sat down there. “But I’m minoring in software engineering, too. In case mechanical doesn’t really work out.”

“Oh! I’m taking mechanical engineering as well! But my minor is ballet.”

Peridot nodded, not knowing what to say. She whispered to Amethyst, “Do all your friends have gem names?”

“Most of them,” Amethyst whispered back, smirking.

“I’m Bismuth!” the rainbow-haired girl greeted enthusiastically. She stuck her hand out and Peridot shook it weakly.

“Garnet,” the one with the afro said smoothly. Something about her creeped Peridot out.

“So, Peri,” Amethyst said, making Peridot cringe at the nickname, “what year are you in?”

“Freshman. This is my first year.”

“Me too, dude!” Amethyst laughed. “We could have the same room number! I haven’t gone to my dorm yet.”

“Uh, you should probably do that,” Peridot answered, but her voice was humorous. Amethyst wouldn’t be that bad of a roommate. Peridot was already starting to think of her as a friend.

“Garnet’s a senior,” Amethyst continued, pointing at the tall woman. “And Bismuth and Pearl here are juniors.” She fixed her gaze towards them.

“Are you guys going to order anything?” a girl called from behind the counter. She looked oddly familiar…like…

“Miller!” Peridot cried. 

The girl looked up. “Yes?”

“Sorry…are you Barb Miller’s daughter?”

The girl laughed. “Yeah, I’m Sadie.”

Amethyst stood up. “You guys want anything?”

Peridot shrugged. “A coffee would be nice.”

The rainbow-haired girl, Bismuth, checked her watch. “I’ve got to go,” she sighed, standing up. “Bye, everyone.” She looked at Peridot. “It was nice meeting you.”

“You too,” Peridot responded, nodding.

Amethyst went up to order. She came back a few minutes later with two chocolate donuts and a coffee.

“Hey, Peri, are you doing anything tomorrow? At nine thirty-ish?”

Peridot thought about it for a minute. Her classes ended at three.

“N-no,” she stuttered. “I guess not.”

“We’re going to a party! You should come.”

“A party?” Peridot looked at Amethyst. “Those aren’t…I don’t really go to parties.”

“Come on, it’ll be fun! You don’t have to drink anything if you don’t want to. Like Pearl.”

The junior crossed her arms and sniffed, annoyed. “I’m getting tea,” she muttered, getting up.

“I’ll…I’ll think about it.”

Garnet put her arms around the chairs lazily, looking off to the distance. Or, Peridot thought she was looking off to the distance. The sunglasses made it hard to tell.

The bell in the front jangled. Amethyst turned around to see who it was.

“Lapis! Hey!” she greeted, grinning.

_Lapis?_ Another _gem name? This is getting out of hand…_

Peridot turned around to see who it was. She held in a gasp.

The blue-haired girl.

“Amethyst, I need to get out of here. Right now.”

“Why?” the other freshman asked, louder than Peridot.

“I might’ve…bumped into her.”

“You bumped into me.”

“That was different! I bumped into you from behind—not right into your chest. And I might’ve, er, stormed off.”

Amethyst snickered. “Sure, you can go, but take this first,” Amethyst replied, taking out a piece of paper and scribbling something on it. “Text me. Also, I don’t think Lapis minded—”

But Peridot was already heading out. 

* * *

Peridot had slid out as fast as she could, and had managed to find herself in front of the university again. She had embarrassed herself enough. Why was she doing it again?

_Whatever. Maybe my roommate is here._

Peridot was a little excited to meet who it was. Maybe they would be like Pearl, majoring in the same thing as her.

As Peridot rounded the corner, she finished her coffee. She felt more hyper than ever. Throwing the container in the trash, she entered the dorm.

Nobody was there. Peridot sighed. The other bed wasn’t empty, though. There was an explosion of blue. Blue sheets, blue pillows, a blue bag shoved under the bed. All a cobalt blue color. Posters hung on the wall next to the bed, and a few books were stashed in the nightstand.

Peridot sighed and clambered on to her bed, laying down peacefully.

Peridot was still on her bed, wondering if her roommate had a gem name, when she heard the door click open.

Instantly, the freshman perked up. Who would it be? Her grin faded away when she saw who had entered.

_Lapis._

“Oh. It’s you,” Lapis said, holding an iced tea as she walked in.

Peridot stared off into space silently.

“Sorry,” Peridot mumbled.

“About what?”

“B-bumping into you. And storming off.”

“Whatever, nerd,” Lapis said, getting on her bed. She started checking her phone.

“So, uh, your name’s Lapis, right?”

“Yeah. Lapis Lazuli.”

“Peridot Diamond.”

Lapis froze for a second. Then, she shrugged it off and half-nodded. The blunette started typing something.

Peridot stared off into space some more for a while, until she heard something.

“Did you not turn it off?”

“What?”

“The sounds. When you type things.”

Lapis smiled. “I like annoying people with it.” She turned over so she was on her stomach.

“Right…”

Peridot’s classes didn’t start until tomorrow. She wanted to ask what Lapis was majoring in, but something stopped her.

Bored with nothing to do, Peridot pulled out her laptop and controller.

After a few minutes, Lapis looked over to Peridot. “ _Are you playing_ Overwatch?”

Peridot looked up at her and started blushing. “N-no!”

“Aw, you’re cute when you’re flustered.”

Peridot felt herself blushing harder. “Shut up, Lazuli.”

Lapis smirked but stopped talking to her. Peridot continued to play _Overwatch_ , trying to ignore the various looks her roommate gave her.

Eventually, Lapis started reading. Peridot couldn’t tell what book it was. 

She decided she needed to get ready for tomorrow.

Peridot got up and started pulling out textbooks. Lapis watched her, bored. Peridot didn’t catch when Lapis pulled out a different book, one that was all blue on the cover, and started drawing in it.

Peridot glanced at her. The blue-haired girl was very into it.

“Um, what are you drawing?” Peridot asked hesitantly.

“I’m planning out my next watercolor masterpiece,” Lapis deadpanned.

“Oh. I like to draw too. But more digital and character stuff.”

“That’s nice.”

Silence.

“Aren’t you going to get ready?”

“For what?”

“Classes. Tomorrow?” 

Lapis shrugged. “I don’t really care. I can get ready tomorrow.”

“When’s your first class?”

“Ten.”

“That’s when my first class is! I’m getting ready, you should too—”

“ _You_ are a _nerd_ ,” Lapis replied, which shut Peridot up.

Peridot continued shoving notebooks and pencils everywhere.

“What class is it, anyway?”

Peridot glanced at Lapis, where the question had come from. Her half-lidded eyes were still looking at her drawing.

“Math.”

“That’s going to be hard on you.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. It was going to be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i dont know how colleges work, so sorry if I messed something up-


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis convinces Peridot to go to the party. It doesn't go exactly as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos and stuff!
> 
> I was kind of going through major writer's block while writing this chapter and the next one - so the writing is kind of crappy, and the first part is filler, but the ending is important.

Peridot woke up to the ringing sound of an alarm.

Grumbling, the blonde smacked down on her phone. She groggily got out of bed, surprised to find her blue-haired roommate already up.

“You’re…up?” she asked.

Lapis was brushing her hair. “Yeah, why?”

“I just…” Peridot looked away. “Never mind. Didn’t think you would brush that hair, Lazuli, with the state it was in.”

Lapis snorted. “Have you seen yourself?”

Peridot’s hand shot up to her hair, and she felt her face flush. She muttered something under her breath.

“Good morning to you too,” her roommate laughed, handing Peridot her glasses. Peridot snatched them from her, shoved them on, and got up.

As Peridot walked to the lecture hall, a feeling of excitement welled up in her.

It was gone by the end of the hour

Peridot apathetically dragged herself to her next lecture. By the time she was out of there, she needed at least four cups of coffee.

Peridot had an hour break before two more classes. She stumbled towards her dorm, deciding to start her math homework.

“How do you have homework already?” Lapis asked.

Peridot answered with a glare. “What have you been doing all day?”

“I had class,” Lapis answered, rolling her eyes. “And then swimming. Now I don’t have classes until two.”

“You’re on the swim team? I didn’t know.”

Lapis smiled. “There’s a _lot_ you don’t know about me.”

Peridot and Lapis didn’t interact much for the next hour. Peridot did her homework and Lapis…Peridot wasn’t really sure what Lapis did. She started off also doing her homework, but it quickly evolved into her just reading.

About fifteen minute before Peridot had to leave, she heard an eruption of _pings!_ coming from Lapis’ phone. The blue-haired girl checked it and frowned.

“What’s wrong?” Peridot asked cautiously.

“Nothing,” Lapis murmured, texting furiously.

The blonde got up warily. “I’m leaving but I’ll be back.”

“Yeah, okay…”

Peridot frowned but grabbed her stuff and left.

* * *

When Peridot got back, Lapis wasn’t there. The blonde had begun to enjoy the sarcastic remarks her roommate made.

Having nothing else to do, Peridot texted Amethyst.

It ended with her coming over.

“Oh, who’s your roommate, dude?” Amethyst asked as she entered the dorm.

“Lapis,” Peridot muttered.

“That must’ve been awkward. For you, at least. Lapis probably didn’t ca—”

“She didn’t.”

“What’s she like?”

“I thought you guys knew each other,” Peridot scoffed.

“She’s your roommate.”

“There’s not much difference. If anything, she talks less to me.”

Amethyst rambled on about her life, Peridot listening intently (while also playing video games). The more Amethyst talked, the more Peridot realized something was wrong. Amethyst felt like she shouldn’t have happened. She came out wrong.

“Are you okay?” blurted out Peridot.

Amethyst stopped talking. “Yeah, what do you mean?”

“It’s just, you…your self-esteem isn’t exactly at a great level.”

“Yeah, I…” Peridot’s friend looked at the wall. “There’s this kid. He’s really cool. Only fourteen but…he’s helped a lot of people.”

Peridot found Amethyst smiling. “He’s a great guy. Like a little brother. You should’ve seen me in high school. After I saw my cousins, especially. But they accepted me. They liked me.”

“Who is this kid?”

Peridot heard the door slam open. Lapis entered and shoved her stuff on to her bed and sat down next to it.

“Mood,” Amethyst muttered.

“Shut up, Amethyst,” Lapis responded, glaring at her.

“What’s his name?” Peridot pestered.

“Steven,” the lavender-haired girl replied.

“Steven?” Lapis perked up, a look of hope on her face.

“You know him, too?” Peridot asked. Lapis nodded. 

“I babysit him when Pearl and Greg are busy.”

“Wait,” a look of confusion passed Peridot’s face. “Pearl has a kid?”

The single comment made Amethyst laugh out loud and Lapis roll her eyes and mutter something under her breath.

Amethyst’s face got serious again. “Steven’s mom, Rose...she died when he was born. Pearl always looked up to Rose, even crushing on her—”

“It was a one-way thing, Rose was much older than Pearl,” Lapis interrupted.

“Yeah. Rose was like a mom to me. But Rose always saw Pearl as a little sister. Now Pearl shares custody of Steven with Greg, his dad.”

“Oh,” Peridot said. Rose. She sounded inspirational.

_Ping!_

Lapis checked her phone. Her usual smirk left her face.

“Is it Jasper?” Amethyst asked.

“Yeah…” Lapis muttered.

“Jasper?! Vitiligo? Whitish hair?” Peridot retorted.

“Yeah.”

"She’s such a clod!” Jasper had gone to the same high school in Peridot. Peridot hadn’t known that they both got into BCU.

“That’s my girlfriend you’re talking about there,” Lapis answered, looking at Peridot.

“Y-your girlfriend?! _Jasper_?!”

“Yeah,” Lapis smirked. “Why do you care?”

Peridot felt her cheeks get warm. “No, not like that,” she mumbled. “You’re probably just in it to smash her, anyway.”

Lapis shot a look at Peridot. “What was that?”

“Nothing!”

Lapis walked up to Peridot. “I heard you Peridot.” Not five seconds later Peridot was shoved against her bed and Lapis was on top of her, her eyes holding fire, her face still holding a smug look.

“Say that again and you—”

“Hey guys,” Amethyst said blatantly. “I’m still here. Lapis, you can kill Peri later.”

Lapis got off Peridot’s bed and stormed to her own. “Whatever,” she muttered.

“I should probably go,” Amethyst said. “I’ve been here for two hours. I have another class in like ten minutes. Bye.”

“Later, Amethyst.”

Peridot’s friend got up and shut the door behind her softly.

“So, how was your day?”

“It was okay,” Lapis answered. 

“Your mood changed suddenly, didn’t it?”

“I get mood swings. A lot.”

“Right…” Peridot grumbled. “I had a great day too, thanks.”

“I’m sure it was amazing, with math first and all,” Lapis replied, pulling out her little blue sketchbook.

“What do you even draw in there?”

“Stuff,” she mumbled, opening a new page.

Peridot rolled her eyes. “Don’t you have homework?”

“No, I don’t. I finished it already. Now shut up.”

Peridot sighed and pulled out her laptop. She had to get an essay done.

Peridot didn’t realize how long she was working on her essay. When she was done with it, the hour hand of her watch was nearing eight.

Lapis was staring off into space.

Peridot smiled, knowing exactly what to do.

“ _Camp Pining Hearts_ time!” she exclaimed to herself.

“What’s that?” Lapis asked, bored.

“It’s this great sh—”

“Never mind. I don’t care.”

 _Mood swing, huh?_ Peridot thought skeptically. She chose to rewatch the episode in which Percy and Pierre met for the first time. It was an hour long special.

Peridot was just at the part where Pierre spoke to Percy when she felt Lapis tapping on her shoulder.

Peridot took her headphones out and glanced at her roommate. “What?”

“Aren’t you going to get ready? There’s no way you’re going in that,” she responded, pointing at Peridot’s green and black sweatshirt.

Peridot hadn’t noticed that Lapis changed out of her blue t-shirt and shorts into a black crop top and jeans.

“What do you—where are you going?”

“Remember? There’s a party? I know Amethyst told you.”

“Oh. I’m not going. Parties aren’t really my thing.”

Lapis grabbed Peridot’s shoulder. “I hate people, too. C’mon, it’ll be fun.”

“But _Camp Pining He_ —”

“I’ll watch your cheesy show with you if you come. Tomorrow. Do you have any classes?”

Tomorrow was Saturday. “N-no.”

“Then come on.”

Peridot grumbled but hesitantly agreed. She put on jeans and a nice white t-shirt.

“Is this fine?”

“Yeah, sure. Now come one,” Lapis said, taking hold of Peridot’s wrist. She pulled her out the door.

“If you hate people so much, why are you going?”

“I just have a lot on my mind. This’ll help.”

“Oh, so it’s not just so I go?”

“Yeah, I’m going to a party just to drag my nerdy roommate along,” Lapis giggled. There was a snort in her laugh, and Peridot found herself not minding it. She also found herself right next to Lapis.

“You can let go of my hand now, Lapis,” Peridot grunted. “You’ve convinced me to go.”

Lapis let go of Peridot’s hand without much thought. 

“Where are we going, exactly?” Peridot asked.

“There’s this room...the students party there all the time. The teachers don’t really know about it or don’t care. Now come on.”

“Is Pearl really going to be there? She didn’t seem like the party type.”

“Amethyst will convince her. She’ll probably be off, flirting with Bismuth or something.”

“They seem nice. Garnet kind of weirded me out.”

“Garnet’s nice once you get to know her. _Pearl_ on the other hand,” Lapis rolled her eyes. “She’s crazy, I swear.”

Peridot laughed.

As they got closer to the “secret area”, Peridot said, “You better not drink too much. I’m not watching CPH with someone who’s hungover.”

“I promise I won’t drink too much,” Lapis smiled.

Lapis pushed open the doors. There were a lot of people, dancing, making out, drinking, laughing.

“Normally I drink until the crowd doesn’t bother me,” Lapis explained. “But I guess today I’ll have to deal with them.”

Peridot snickered.

Lapis rolled her eyes and sighed. “I’m going to go. Have fun, dork.”

Lapis strode away, leaving Peridot alone.

“Shoot. This was a mistake.”

The blonde knew she could just leave, but then Lapis would get upset. She wouldn’t watch _Camp Pining Hearts_ with Peridot. And for some reason, Peridot really wanted to do that with Lapis.

She exhaled and went to find Amethyst.

The loud, purple-haired girl was in a corner with a nervous-looking Pearl.

“Peridot!” she called, “You came!”

“Yeah,” Peridot mumbled, walking over.

“Did you bring Lapis?”

“It’s more like Lapis brought me, actually.”

“Where is she?”

“I don’t know. Probably with Jasper.”

Amethyst looked up. “There’s Jasper,” she pointed. “And there’s Lapis.”

Jasper had her hand around Lapis. Her other hand was holding a shot of tequila. She took a swig as Lapis looked up at her.

“Aren’t you going to drink?” Peridot heard Jasper ask.

“Maybe a little. I—my roommate, I told her I wouldn’t.”

“When has that ever stopped you?”

Lapis laughed. “I’m sorry Jasper, but just not today.”

Peridot grinned. Lapis really did want to watch _Camp Pining Hearts_ with her.

“So, Peridot, what will it be?” Amethyst asked.

“I’ll just have...watered down beer or something.”

“That’s it?” Amethyst frowned. “Come on, Peri, lighten up.”

“Not today. I have to not get hungover tomorrow.”

“Fine,” Amethyst rolled her eyes. “One very watered down beer coming up.”

“Same for me,” Lapis called as she and Jasper joined them.

“I’ll have a whiskey,” Jasper grinned. She looked at Peridot. “Hey, twerp! Haven’t seen you in a while!” Peridot could just tell that the look on her face was smug.

Peridot and Jasper didn’t exactly have the _best_ relationship. Back in high school, they had a peculiar relationship. Peridot wouldn’t have called them friends. Jasper wouldn’t have called them friends. They were more than acquaintances, though. Peridot knew too much about Jasper for them to be just that. She was like a companion.

Peridot remembered her high school days. She didn’t ramble on about stuff as much, because she didn’t have the chance. She didn’t indulge in anything. Jasper was the annoying one. In a different way than Peridot was now—while Peridot was just generally irritating, Jasper seemed to close in on one person. That one person was Peridot.

Jasper had changed Peridot’s mindset on so many concepts. They had gotten away with too many things. Peridot didn’t realize all that until her senior year, when Jasper went to college.

And now here they were again, standing around with drinks in their hands.

Peridot finally had the nerve to look up at her former companion. Had Jasper gotten taller? Maybe Peridot had just gotten shorter—the muscular girl loomed over, grinning. She had whitish orange hair, and vitiligo, which made her look even scarier. Her hands were probably as big as Peridot’s face.

Peridot held in a gulp. Why was she here again? Right, Lapis. _Camp Pining Hearts_ . She was doing this for _Camp Pining Hearts_. Not enough people watched it. Not enough people thought Percy was better off with Pierre and not Paulette. Not enough people hated Paulette.

“Y-you’ve gotten bigger,” Peridot stuttered. Jasper was sizing her up, looking at her up and down.

“So have you,” Jasper replied, lingering at Peridot’s hips.

Peridot blushed and pulled down her shirt. The blonde’s hips had started to get wider.

“Hey, sis,” Amethyst greeted.

“Wait,” a confused Peridot said. “Amethyst, you went to my high school?”

“Not exactly,” the stout girl answered. “When I was younger...I ran away. I only told Jasper where I went. She didn’t visit me until right before college.”

Silence passed over the college students.

“I went back to our parents during the summer. Then I came back a few weeks before college. And decided to stay for a while longer,” Jasper said, breaking the silence, and nudging an inert Lapis.

“Shut up, Jasper.” Lapis said. Peridot knew there was humor in what she said.

Maybe Jasper could be a friend.

“While we’re drunk, we should totally play truth or dare,” Amethyst laughed.

Peridot sighed. Right. She had to do this.

“I’ll go first. Lapis, truth or dare?”

“Dare,” was the blunette’s immediate answer.

“I dare you to…” Amethyst looked around. Some tissues were shoved in a box.

“Eat those,” she smirked, pushing the box towards Lapis.

Peridot’s roommate frowned. “I’m not drunk enough to do this,” she sighed, pulling out a tissue and pushing it into her mouth.

Peridot looked away as Lapis gagged and swallowed.

“Can I have water?”

Peridot noticed Garnet walk over. Her strides were strong and calculated. Peridot was reminded of her mother.

She didn’t want to be reminded of her mother.

The one difference that made it okay was that Garnet’s steps weren’t cold. They were supposed to show how...how _wise_ she was, not how much power she had. Peridot held in a sigh of relief.

“Garnet,” Lapis said, pointing at the newcomer. “Truth or dare?”

“Truth,” Garnet said, the corners of her mouth twitching.

Lapis analyzed the senior. “Have you ever skipped any classes?”

“I—” Garnet’s voice faltered. “This one time. I skipped math. But that was back in high school.”

Peridot’s eyes went wide in surprise. She hadn’t taken Garnet to be someone who skipped class. She seemed responsible. 

_It was only one class, I suppose._

Garnet turned to Jasper. “Truth or dare?”

Jasper laughed. A raspy, heavy, loud laugh. “Dare.”

Garnet grinned. “Pearl, you can take this one.”

“Wh-what?” Pearl stammered. She looked at Amethyst for guidance. The Latina stood on her tippy-toes as Pearl crouched down, and whispered something in her pale friend’s ear.

Pearl sighed. “Chug a whole glass of beer. In under twenty seconds.”

Jasper’s hands left Lapis’ shoulders. She cracked her knuckles. “Easy! Hand it over!”

Amethyst picked up a glass of beer and handed it to her sister. Jasper snatched it and pressed the cup to her lips.

Ten seconds later, the brown liquid inside was gone.

“I’m impressed,” Lapis deadpanned. Amethyst and Pearl stared in awe. Garnet simply chuckled. Peridot gaped at Jasper.

“Stop staring, short stuff,” Jasper grinned. “You’re next. Truth or dare?”

“T-truth,” Peridot stuttered.

Jasper thought for a bit. “I’m guessing you’ve never gotten to third base.”

Peridot blushed.

“How far have you gotten while making out with someone?”

“I’ve never…” Peridot mumbled, “I’ve never made out with someone.”

Amethyst nearly spit out her wine. “What? We’ve got to get you someone! What’s your preference?”

“Girls,” Peridot muttered. “But I don’t want to...go there, unless I’m really close with them.”

“It’s alright, dude!” Amethyst grinned. “Hmmm...maybe a different bar...get some cute girls…”

“It’s fine, really,” Peridot sighed.

The girls went back and forth, asking questions and daring each other. Peridot didn’t get called on again, but Amethyst kept eyeing her, as if she was thinking who to put her on a blind date with.

The music got louder. Jasper started talking with her sister. Pearl lingered near Garnet. Peridot looked at the only one left: Lapis. The blunette was texting someone on her phone. She glanced at Peridot.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Peridot stammered. She didn’t like the crowd and how loud it was. Her hands fidgeted, and she tried to get closer to the doorway.

Before she could make her grand escape, Peridot felt fingers wrap around her wrist. “Peridot,” Lapis whispered. “Where are you going?”

“I’m leaving! This place is making me uncomfortable…”

“No you’re not. Do you really think I’m enjoying this? Come on.”

Peridot felt her roommate pulling her towards the crowd.

“What do you expect me to do? Dance?” Peridot scowled.

“You can if you want to,” Lapis shrugged. “I only came here for Jasper. And the drinks, which I had to water down.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “It’s better. You get to enjoy the miracle called _Camp Pining Hearts_ without being hungover.”

“Tell me about _Camp Pining Hearts_ , Ms. Diamond.”

Peridot grinned. “It’s this _amazing_ teen drama from the ‘90’s! I’m on the last few episodes of season 5, but I can totally watch the other seasons again.”

Lapis smiled lazily. Her dark blue, half-lidded eyes gazed somewhere else. “Who’s your favorite character?”

“Pierre!” Peridot squeaked. She felt a rant coming. “He’s amazing! And _so_ much better for Percy than _Paulette_. She’s such a—”

“Hey,” Lapis stopped Peridot by placing a hand on her shoulder. “Let me watch it. No spoilers.”

“Oh. Of c-course,” Peridot stuttered.

“P-dot!” Amethyst called from behind. Peridot turned to look at her.

The Latino grinned. “Did you get flustered again? That’s what, the fourth time tonight?”

Peridot’s blush deepened. “Shut up, Amethyst.”

Amethyst used her hand to mess Peridot’s hair up. “You’re fun to tease. Right, Lapis?”

Lapis grinned, nodding. It didn’t help that Peridot’s roommate was a master flirt.

Peridot patted the top of her head, trying to fix her hair. “Insufferable clods.”

“Ooh,” Amethyst looked up. “Let’s play Never Have I Ever!”

“Great,” Peridot mumbled. “Lapis is definitely going to get drunk.”

Lapis swatted at her playfully. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’ll go first,” Amethyst said. “Never have I ever kissed a boy.”

“Oh, wow,” Lapis rolled her eyes. “What, are you targeting me? Give me a cup.”

Peridot’s eyes widened. “You’ve ki—what?!” she spluttered.

“Yeah,” Lapis sighed, sipping. “This jerk named Kevin. He seemed nice that one day, but I was _so_ wrong.”

“When was this?” Pearl asked.

“High school. Junior year.”

“Wait, isn’t that the dude who harassed Steven and Connie?” Amethyst asked.

“Yeah.”

“Who’s Connie?” Peridot questioned.

Amethyst grinned. “Steven’s _girlfriend_ ,” she snickered.

“They’ve been crushing on each other for the _longest_ time,” Garnet said.

Pearl nodded. “It’s hilarious. I wish they just admitted that they liked each other.”

“So do all of us, P,” Amethyst sighed. “Anyway! Peri’s turn!”

What had Peridot never done? A lot of things, that’s for sure. “Never have I ever...uh...failed a test.”

“Peridot!” Jasper groaned. “That’s the nerdiest thing I’ve ever heard!”

Amethyst, Jasper, Lapis, and even Garnet reached for a cup. Pearl stared at them. “Maybe if you guys _studied more_ ,” she muttered under her breath.

“Lapis’ turn!” Amethyst grinned, slightly slurring her words.

Lapis thought for a moment. “Never have I ever done it with someone in a public bathroom.”

“Get outta here,” Jasper scowled, reaching for a glass. Amethyst did, as well.

“You guys are disgusting,” Lapis shuddered.

Jasper rolled her eyes. “Garnet, you’re turn.”

Garnet narrowed her eyes. At least, that’s what Peridot thought she was doing. Her eyes were still covered by her sunglasses. Indoors.

“Never have I ever had a friend with benefits.”

Pearl reached for the cup, muttering something under her breath. 

Amethyst nudged Peridot. “Rose.”

“Ms. Friends With Benefits is next,” Jasper snickered.

Pearl sighed. “Never have I ever gotten grounded by my parents.”

A pause.

Something in Lapis had clicked. Peridot noticed her muscles tense, her hands get clammy and then start to shake. There was something in her eyes, something that showed sadness, something that showed fear.

“Hey,” Peridot whispered. “Are you okay?”

“No,” Lapis whispered back, and then pushed past her.

“Lapis?” Jasper called. Her words were slurred. She couldn’t go after her girlfriend.

Peridot turned around and followed Lapis.

* * *

“Lapis?” Peridot called. She walked into the bathroom, where she had seen Lapis head.

Peridot got a sniffle in response, coming from behind a large stall.

“Lapis, what happened?” Concern flooded her voice.

“N-nothing,” Lapis answered. Peridot could hear her squirm.

Peridot sat down in front of the stall. “Lapis, stop lying. What’s wrong?”

“It’s just that…Pearl mentioned parents. And grounding.”

“Okay…?”

Lapis sighed. “You wouldn’t get it, Peridot. You wouldn’t understand!” Peridot heard her roommate’s breath get shakier.

“I can try,” Peridot answered. Lapis stopped fidgeting and slumped down. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” the blonde whispered.

The roommates sat in silence for a few minutes.

“When I was little…my parents n-never let me do anything. They hated me. They would l-lock me in the bathroom. I would stare in the mirror for hours…”

 _Hours?_ Peridot thought.

“I hate mirrors,” Lapis mumbled. “I felt...trapped. When high school ended I got out of the house as fast as I could. I changed my last name.”

“You couldn’t think of anything besides Lazuli?” Peridot smirked.

“Shut up, Peridot,” Lapis answered. “It sounds elenquant.”

“Ah, you’re one with words.”

Lapis couldn’t help but snicker. Peridot heard a snort.

Silence sat between them.

“Do you want to go back to our dorm?”

Lapis exhaled. “Hell yes.”

Peridot stood up when she heard fidgeting with the door. Lapis came out, tear stains on her cheeks.

“You okay, Lazuli?”

“I’m...fine.”

Peridot frowned but didn’t say anything else.

* * *

The night sky had a splatter of stars on it. Peridot had never seen the sky so beautiful. Back in Empire City, the sky was normally clouded, the stars not so bright.

Peridot felt Lapis lean on her. “Aren’t you cold?”

Lapis scoffed, “I don’t get cold.”

“ _Sure_.”

A few minutes of silence passed between them.

“Why did you come after me?”

Peridot stopped. “What do you mean?”

“You barely know me.”

“I’m offended, Lazuli. We’re roommates!”

“Yeah, so? You met me, like, two days ago,” Lapis replied, rolling her eyes.

Peridot shuffled, kicking a pebble. “Well...I would consider you my friend.”

There were a few more minutes of silence.

“I would consider you my friend, too, Peridot.”

Lapis turned away and continued walking to their dorm. 

Peridot couldn’t help but smile.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis accompanies Peridot in watching Camp Pining Hearts.

Once again, Peridot woke up to the sound of her alarm.

She heard Lapis groan on the other bed. Her roommate was probably woken up from the sound.

The blonde fumbled with her phone. “Sorry…” she muttered, putting it on snooze.

A few minutes later, Peridot heard the sound again. She grumbled and decided to wake up.

Peridot stood up and saw Lapis awake. “Why do you have an alarm on Saturday if you don’t have any classes?”

“I think I forgot to turn it off for today,” Peridot replied.

“Are you going to the bathroom first or me?” There was only one bathroom in their hallway.

“How long do you take in the shower?”

Lapis slouched and pulled out her phone. “A while.”

Peridot rolled her eyes and went into the bathroom to get ready. She was out in fifteen minutes.

Lapis took almost half an hour in the bathroom. “What were you even doing in there?” Peridot asked her later.

“You could’ve come inside and seen!” Lapis answered in her flirtatious way, smirking.

Peridot got flustered and decided not to ask again.

After her roommate half-brushed her hair into a manageable state, Peridot said, “I’m going to the donut place. Unless there are other ways to get breakfast here…?”

“Not really,” Lapis answered, tugging on her dark blue sweatshirt. “And I’m coming with you.”

“Great. Because I have no idea where it is.”

Lapis laughed. She clasped Peridot’s hand and pulled her out.

“Come on, dork.”

“Aren’t you going to wear shoes?”

“I hate shoes. Now hurry up.”

Peridot followed Lapis out of the building and on to the streets. She dragged her to where Amethyst had brought Peridot only two days ago.

When they entered, the first thing Peridot noticed was that a young boy who looked eight or nine was munching happily on his donut. The boy was chubby and had curly hair. He was wearing a bright red shirt with a yellow star, jeans, and pink slippers.

“Steven!” Lapis cried. She grinned, letting go of Peridot’s hand, and hopped over to him.

“Lapis!” Steven smiled. “How are you doing?”

“I’m great! How’s Greg?”

“Dad’s great! You know what happened yesterday?”

“What?”

“Connie showed me her school! She said I’m supposed to be in ninth grade—”

“Wait,” Peridot interrupted. “You’re in  _ ninth grade _ ?”

Steven nodded. “Well, I’m homeschooled. Who are you? Are you Lapis’ friend?”

“Yes,” Peridot answered. “I’m her roommate.”

“Oh yeah! You guys are in college!”

“Steven, this is Peridot,” Lapis explained. “We’re just here for breakfast.”

“And then we’re going to watch  _ Camp Pining Hearts _ !” Peridot grinned.

Steven’s eyes became wide. “ _ Camp Pining Hearts _ ? I love that show!”

Peridot squealed. “Yeah! See, Lapis, it’s a great show!”

Lapis was visibly trying to hold in her laughter. “Steven’s favorite show is  _ Crying Breakfast Friends _ .”

Steven looked down. “It’s a very sad show.”

“I’ve never watched it,” Peridot answered. “I’m sure  _ Camp Pining Hearts  _ is better.”

“Hey, Steven,” Lapis turned to the boy. “Do I need to babysit you anytime soon?”

“Uh, Dad said maybe next week. He might have to go to the city.”

“The city?” Peridot interrogated.

“Empire City.”

“Oh,” Peridot scrunched her face in distaste. “I’m…from there. And as of now I don’t exactly have the  _ best _ relationship with my mother.”

Lapis sighed. “What did you do?” 

Peridot’s finger fidgeted. “I might’ve called her a...clod.”

Lapis started laughing. Steven looked at Peridot. “I don’t know what that means, but it doesn’t sound very nice. Why’d you say that?”

“I…she wasn’t listening to me. I said that I wanted to go to Beach City University, and she said that it wasn’t top tier,” Peridot stopped, looking at Steven. “No offense.”

“None taken.”

“Empire City’s college wasn’t good for someone who wanted to take mechanical engineering. This one is good. Of course, my mother didn’t want me to take mechanical engineering.”

“Do you like mechanical engineering?”

“Yes.”

“Then you should take it!”

Peridot smiled.

Lapis called from the counter, “What do you want, Peridot?”

“Wait! I’m paying!” the blonde squeaked. “A coffee, please.”

“And an iced tea,” Lapis continued.

The person at the counter was a lanky boy who looked bored out of his mind. He had bouncy, shaved brown hair, leaving only a tuft on the top. His ears were pierced and he was wearing a purple Big Donut t-shirt on it, identical to Sadie’s.

“Let me pay half,” Lapis argued. “Or at least for my part.”

“Fine.”

They both shoved money on to the counter. The boy responded by handing them both what they wanted.

“Bye, Lars!” Steven said, waving his hand. The boy grunted in response.

The roommates left side by side.

“ _ Camp Pining Hearts _ time!” Peridot grinned.

Lapis rolled her eyes. “Let’s see how good this show is.”

“It’s top-tier.”

“Of course it is.”

They walked into the dorm.

Peridot bounced to her computer. “Let me set it up. It’ll take like, ten minutes.”

Lapis shrugged. “What’s it about, again?”

“A camp!”

“Oh. right.”

Peridot patted the space next to her. Lapis sighed and hesitantly sat down there.

“You’re going to  _ love _ this show. It’s the best! The character development, the characters—besides Paulette. She’s the  _ worst _ .”

“I’ll make sure she’s my favorite character,” Lapis grinned.

Peridot shoved her playfully.

The theme song started playing. Peridot’s eyes were glued to the screen. She half-noticed Lapis gently placing her head on her shoulders, leaning on to her.

When the end credits began to play, Peridot grinned and exclaimed, “And those were the first five episodes!”

She got light snoring in response.

Peridot frowned and tried to nudge Lapis off. But she was clingy.  _ Very  _ clingy. The blunette murmured something and only held Peridot tighter, wrapping her toned arms around Peridot’s waist.

The blonde felt her cheeks flush. “Lapis, wake up,” she whispered.

Lapis, in return, snuggled closer, giggling.

Peridot sighed and gave up. The position wasn’t  _ uncomfortable _ . She could handle this for a while. She grabbed the blanket and placed it over their legs. Nice and warm.

_ Knock, knock, knock! _

Peridot looked up at the door. It was probably Amethyst.

“Lapis, get up.”

“Mmmmhh,” Lapis moaned.

“Someone’s at the door.”

The blonde attempted to get up. The action made her roommate drop on to the bed. “Peri…”

Peridot rolled her eyes and pulled the doorknob open. Amethyst was standing in the doorway, crossing her arms.

“Whatever happened there, that was the  _ weirdest _ thing I’ve ever heard from behind a door,” Amethyst muttered.

“Good afternoon to you, too,” Peridot answered.

Lapis managed a hello from Peridot’s bed.

“Are you guys free? We’re heading down to Fish Stew Pizza.”

“Why didn’t you text me?”

“I did,” Amethyst replied, rolling her eyes. “You never responded, man! Check your phone!”

Peridot grumbled, pulling out her phone. As promised, there were seven unread messages from Amethyst.

“What were you and Lapis doing?”

“We were watching Camp Pining Hearts.”

“That stupid sitcom fromthe ‘90s?  _ Lapis _ managed to watch that with you?”

Peridot muttered something under her breath, flaunting her colorful vocabulary.

“What kind of name is  _ Fish Stew _ Pizza, anyway?” the blonde asked.

Amethyst shrugged. “I dunno, but the pizza’s great! The best in Beach City!”

“And the  _ only one  _ in Beach City,” Lapis said finally, getting up. “That show wasn’t half as bad as I thought it was.”

“Oh, so you actually watched it?” Peridot looked up, surprised.

“What did you  _ think _ she was doing?” Amethyst snickered.

Heat covered Peridot’s cheeks. “That’s not what I meant.”

“You’re so fun to tease,” Lapis giggled lazily. “You get flustered if someone bumps into you.”

Peridot mumbled something about Amethyst and (especially) Lapis being flirts and pulled on her sweatshirt.

Amethyst grabbed Peridot’s hand.  _ People really have to stop doing that _ , the blonde thought as she was pulled out the door. The last thing she saw was Lapis, eyes narrowed and trying not to laugh.

* * *

“Amethyst, is this really necessary?”

“Yeah, Per, of course it is! You gotta meet Jenny and Kiki!”

Peridot rolled her eyes, sighing. Lapis was walking behind her, clad in a sweatshirt and jean shorts, signature smirk on her face.

“They make good pizza. We hang out sometimes.”

“Doing what, drinking?”

Lapis elbowed Peridot. “Shut up.” Her cheeks were tinted pink.

“Is Lapis Lazuli  _ blushing _ ?”

Lapis opened her mouth, as if she was going to say something, but was interrupted by Amethyst. “Hey! Look, it’s here,” the purple-haired girl pointed at a building. The sign was slightly dented.

Amethyst must’ve noticed Peridot staring at the sign, because she snickered, “Courtesy of Garnet.”

“ _ Garnet _ ? Lose her chill?” Peridot scoffed.

“It was a complicated situation. Not really.” Amethyst responded, shrugging.

Lapis held open the door. “You guys coming or not?”

Peridot glanced around. Tables were pushed to a side of the room, all of them empty.

“Pearl and Garnet are coming in a few minutes. Pearl had to pick Steven up,” Amethyst explained, reading Peridot with ease. She motioned towards the table. “You guys can sit down.”

As promised, the junior and senior rushed in with the curly-haired boy.

“Lapis! Peridot!” Steven waved. He proceeded to give Amethyst a high-five.

“They’re like siblings,” Peridot mumbled, looking at her lilac-haired friend and Steven.

“Yeah. My sisters aren’t like that,” Lapis retorted.

“You have siblings?”

“Mmhh. Two younger twin sisters. They’re absolute hell.”

Peridot looked at Steven again. “Is he like a brother to you?”

“Not really,” Lapis shrugged. “I’m more of the really gay aunt.”

Peridot laughed. “What am I?”

“You can be the really gay aunt, too,” Lapis replied simply. Peridot could barely feel the blush on her cheeks through her laughter.

“Yo, Peri! Get over here!” Amethyst called. Peridot got up and walked over to the counter. Two girls were leaning on the walls.

“Hey! I’m Kiki,” one said cheerfully, offering her hand. 

Peridot shook it. “Peridot.”

“I’m Jenny,” the other one nodded. She seemed a few years older, a little more reckless.

“Kiki’s a senior in high school, and Jenny’s a junior at BCU,” Amethyst explained, waving her hands towards them.

Peridot gave a slight nod. She had seen the taller one around sometimes. “Good to know not all your friends have gem names.”

Amethyst sniggered. “What would you like?”

Peridot sighed. “Just cheese is fine.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot talks to people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is kind of short

Peridot’s days passed by quickly. Soon, a week of school was over. One week turned into two, which turned into three, and soon a whole month of school was over.

Beach City’s early October air was surprisingly and pleasantly warm, although it was chilly. Peridot normally hung out in her dorm or with Amethyst when she wasn’t in classes. She had developed a strong bond with the lavender-haired girl, and felt like she could trust her with anything.

“So,” Amethyst said one Saturday, as they lay on the fresh cut grass. “Any new girls lately?”

“Shut up, Amethyst,” Peridot responded.

Amethyst chuckled and sighed. Peridot could’ve sworn there was longing behind it.

They stayed there in silence for a few moments, before Peridot blurted out, “So, how’s Jasper?”

Amethyst turned towards her friend, propping herself up with her right elbow. “She’s fine. Why?”

“I just…haven’t talked to her. In a long time. Properly, you know?”

“Okay…”

“I dunno. I guess…I kinda miss her.”

Amethyst grinned. “She’s in B14.”

Peridot got up. “Should I talk to her? We used to hang out  _ all the time _ . She always teased me,” Peridot laughed, remembering her high school days.

“What, back in high school?”

“Yeah.”

“We were different people then,” Amethyst replied, looking at her fidgeting hands. “I was more insecure. Pearl was even more uptight and…not confident. Garnet was chill. Bismuth wasn’t even here. Lapis was  _ super _ edgy and  _ such _ a flirt, I can’t even  _ begin _ to give that girl justi—”

“Wait,” Peridot stopped her. “Bismuth wasn’t here?”

Amethyst nodded in confirmation. “She used to live here until…she was in eighth grade? Then she kinda disappeared. She came back at the end of her senior year in high school, telling us she had moved away. But she came back, y’know?”

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t know her until she came back. Her and Pearl are really close…” Peridot saw her friend gaze off in the distance. “But it’s okay,” she looked at Peridot, giving her a soft smile.

“Yeah. It’s great,” Peridot returned the smile.

'

* * *

Peridot knocked on the door of B14. Two quick knocks.

A few moments later, the door opened. Jasper loomed over the doorway.

“Hey, twerp!” Jasper grinned.

“Hi,” Peridot answered quickly.

“What brings you here?”

“I just…wanted to catch up.”

“Is it okay if Lapis is here?” the burly girl pointed at her girlfriend, who was upside down on a small couch.

“Yeah…it’s okay. I have to deal with her every day, anyway.”

Jasper’s eyebrows shot up.

“She’s my roommate,” Peridot retorted, entering.

“Oh,” Jasper responded, surprised.

Peridot looked around, a little confused that there was only one bed in the entire room. “Are you…do you not have a roommate?”

“Nah, I got a single room,” Jasper grinned. “You want something to eat?”

“I’m…fine.”

Lapis was on her phone, texting someone. Her feet were propped on the top of the couch, and her blue hair hung from her head, which dangled near the floor.

“Is that position safe?” Peridot glanced at her roommate.

“That’s what she said!” Jasper answered.

Lapis rolled her eyes. “Shut up, Jasper.”

Jasper chortled in response.

“That wasn’t even funny, Jasp,” Lapis ridiculed.

Jasper shrugged, sitting down on her bed. She patted the spot next to her.

“So, Peridot, how’s it been going? Since I left high school and you were tragically alone?” Jasper asked dramatically.

Peridot rolled her eyes. “I got into a lot less trouble, for sure.”

“With me around, you were probably being a nerd  _ all the time _ .”

“Peridot can  _ not  _ be a nerd?” Lapis snorted, pulling herself up.

“No, she was still a nerd. She just did dangerous stuff with me,” Jasper answered, pushing Peridot playfully.

“Oh yeah. Lots of trouble,” Peridot said.

“Like, this one time, we pranked the teacher into thinking the class was over, when only fifteen minutes had gone by.”

Lapis narrowed her eyes. “How did you…”

“That was mostly me,” Peridot said indignantly. “I adjusted the clocks.”

“And this one time? We locked this kid in the janitor’s closet!”

For a fleeting second, Peridot saw Lapis’ humor-filled face morph into one of sadness. One of anger. Then, her face shifted back, a smirk placed on her lips, her eyebrows raised high.

But it had happened. Peridot was sure of it.

And Jasper had caused it.

Jasper looked at her watch. “Shit, I gotta run, Per. I have a class in a minute.”

Lapis got up. “Bye,” she sighed, placing a kiss on Jasper’s lips. She walked out the door

Peridot got up as well, mumbling something along the lines of, “See you later,” and left. Jasper came out a few moments later, waving, and then bolted down the hallway.

Lapis was leaning on the wall next to the door. She glanced at Peridot. “You want to go to the beach?”

“R-right now?” Peridot stuttered.

“Is that a yes or a no?”

Lapis’ offer seemed more like a demand, so Peridot just nodded. Lapis wrapped her fingers around Peridot’s and pulled her in the other direction.

Peridot stumbled out of the university. A cool breeze hit her face. “Come on, dork,” Lapis whispered.

The blue-haired girl led Peridot to the edge of the water. She smiled, sitting down, and looking across the water.

“So,” Peridot stammered.

Lapis looked at her with a questioning look on her face.

“Wh-why did you bring me here?”

Lapis laughed, tossing her head back. “I dunno. You seem to need some…time to relax. We can skip rocks or something, if you’d like.”

“Yeah. Sure.”

Lapis picked up a pebble and fondled it. Peridot stared at her slim fingers. Subsequently, the blunette flicked the rock across the ocean. It jumped on the water, once, twice, three times, and sank.

Peridot scoffed. “That’s it? Me and Jasper could go up to like, nine.”

Lapis rolled her eyes. “My record’s, like, thirty.”

“Yeah right,” Peridot responded, grabbing a rock. She skipped it. It only lasted two skips before it plopped into the ocean.

Lapis was trying hard not to laugh. Peridot blushed. “I—the ocean isn’t the ideal body of water. Lakes are better for this kind of thing. Or ponds. Not the ocean.”

At this point, Lapis was laughing hard, snorts escaping every few seconds. Peridot felt the air around her getting hotter and hotter.

“I’m—I—I know how to—aack!” Peridot spluttered, verbally keyboard smashing. 

Lapis wiped a tear of joy from her eye. “I can see why Jasper hung out with you. You’re easy to tease,” she sniggered, poking Peridot on her forearm.

“Hey!”

“And, like Amethyst has said countless times, you get flustered, like, every five seconds.”

And the name of Amethyst, Peridot’s face got softer.

“I think…I think she really likes someone. Bismuth. Or Pearl. I’m betting on Pearl, but—”

“What?” Lapis stopped laughing. “ _ Pearl? _ Amethyst—our Amethyst, the loud, lazy, always-fighting-with-Pearl Amethyst—like  _ Pearl? _ "

“Yeah!” Peridot argued. “I...I dunno…she seemed to be pining. After Pearl. We were just talking about Bismuth and…”

“Bismuth,” Lapis’ look solidified.

“Hm?”

“I could’ve sworn…someone just like her…back when Blue Diamond…” the blunette's voice started shaking, and her breaths were getting faster.

“Lapis!” Peridot grabbed her shoulders. “Calm down. It’s okay. We’re okay. You aren’t back there. You’re here. With me. Peridot. By the ocean.”

Lapis’ eyes locked with Peridot. After a moment of tension, she calmed down.

Peridot sighed in relief. They sat calmly for a few minutes, in the waning dusk light, listening to the waves.

“You, um, mentioned a Blue Diamond?”

Lapis looked at Peridot again. Her fingers were twitching.

“I’m sorry, I just—”

“No, it’s okay,” Lapis sighed, looking at the water. “Blue Diamond…she helped my parents. She told them to—to lock me in the bathroom, a-and, and, to—”

“Lapis, stop,” Peridot said sternly. When her gaze reached Lapis’ deep blue eyes, she immediately regretted it. So much sadness filled those eyes, that Peridot found it hard to breathe. She suddenly felt guilty.

“My…uh, someone who works at our house. They mentioned Bl— _ her _ to my mother once. She got kind of…really, really mad, and…that was a long time ago,” Peridot whispered out.

“You don’t think they’re related, do you?”

“No. I have a family tree, and there’s no indication of, erm, removal, of any family member. And it’s pretty old.”

“What if they knew each other?”

“I…I don’t know, Lapis.”

Lapis looked down at nothing for a while.

“Are you rich?”

The question definitely startled Peridot. It wasn’t often that someone who had just shared some past trauma with her suddenly blurted out a question about Peridot’s family’s…financial position.

“My mother’s a pretty big deal,” Peridot laughed nervously. “Yellow Diamond.”

“Oh.” Lapis dug here nimble hands into the sand. “Is she…I mean...I don’t really know anything about rich, important people. I moved around a lot, and...I was at Empire City for a while, but it was when I was little. I don’t remember much, except, like, middle school.”

“Lucky you. Mother is...quite...possessive.”

“You sound like my high school poetry teacher.”

Peridot smiled at the comment. “Well, yes, I have what someone might call a...large, intellectual vocabulary.”

Lapis rolled her eyes. “I was born in Hawaii. Then I moved to San Francisco. Then Empire City. Then somewhere in Florida. Then Empire City  _ again _ , then Keystone, and finally Beach City.”

“Wow. That’s a lot.”

Lapis smiled. She was laying on her back, now. “I haven’t done much. I mean, I guess I got a tattoo in Keystone—”

“You did  _ what _ ?”

“You haven’t seen?” Lapis peered up at Peridot. “It’s on my back. A teardrop-shaped lapis lazuli. With wings.”

“Nope. Never.”

“I got it after high school ended. After I left my parents. I don’t know why. It seemed cool.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

Lapis laughed. “If you got a tattoo? You should get one on your forehead.”

“ _ What? _ ”

“Yeah. An upside down triangle. Green. Because you’re Peridot.”

Peridot couldn’t stop laughing. In between her giggles, she mustered out something that meant that they should head back to their dorm.

Lapis seemingly understood and stood up, brushing off the sand from her shorts. She stuck her hand out. Peridot took it and pulled herself up.

The entire walk to their dorm, their hands brushed, close to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also these guys dont have any romantic feelings for each other yet


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot has a snowball fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> make sure you read chapter 4 bc i posted it kind of early?? not really????
> 
> also this chapter goes through like two months really quickly so my writing style is weird

October days got colder. Lapis insisted that she wasn’t cold and walked around barefoot, but Peridot had seen her slip on sandals sometimes.

Soon enough, it was time for Halloween.

“You’re not actually going to do anything for Halloween, right?” Peridot asked her roommate a few days before the night. “We have classes, so we can’t drink out or something, and I don’t think you’re going to trick or treat.”

“Steven wants to go,” Lapis replied simply, shrugging. “I always take him. Pearl and Garnet have night classes, anyway, Bismuth has a meeting or something, Jasper doesn’t know Steven that well, and I’m pretty sure Amethyst is going to tag along anyway but run into trouble.”

At the mention of her lavender-haired friend, Peridot relaxed.

“Why? Are you worried about something? Is everything okay?”

Peridot tensed up again when the blunette shot questions at her.

“I just…don’t know this place very well. These people. But I’m staying, so—”

“Hey. No,” Lapis said. She placed her warm hands on Peridot’s. “ _Please_ come with us?” she pleaded, giving Peridot a look she couldn’t refuse, with her choppy blue bangs swept to the side, hair tucked behind her ear, a small pout on her lips.

“F-fine. But I’m staying with you and Amethyst and Steven the entire time.”

“Good,” Lapis smiled. A soft smile. She tousled Peridot’s hair.

Peridot smiled back.

-

The next few days were mostly everyone trying to figure out how to present Steven (who was going as a knight, and his cat, Lion, as his lion) for Halloween. Peridot normally sulked in the back, occasionally giving tips (“Lift the visor on his helmet!” “Make the flag pink!”) but not doing much else.

Steven’s final piece was his big, pink shield. Pearl had said that it belonged to his mother.

Connie was going as a swordfighter. Pearl had actually begun to give the girl lessons. (Peridot was surprised to find Pearl was a swordfighter, but now preferred a spear). Steven had apparently found an old scabbard a few years ago, and had given it to Connie.

It had belonged to his mother.

* * *

“Maybe you should wear some shoes.”

Lapis glared at Peridot, who had made the comment. “I’ll be fine.”

“But we’ll be walking a lot. And it’ll get cold.”

“It’s not _that_ much walking, Peridot. And I don’t get cold.”

“Yeah, right,” Peridot mumbled.

A _ping!_ sound came from the scrawny blonde’s phone. Peridot picked it up. There was a text from Amethyst.

 **_Amethyst:_ ** _P got Steven and Connie ready_

 **_Amethyst:_ ** _r u guys coming?_

Peridot sighed. “C’mon, Lapis, we have to go.”

 **_Peridot:_ ** _we’re coming in a minute_

Lapis had started out the door by this point—Peridot quickly followed. The university was lightly decorated with halloween decorations, cobwebs strewn across corners, paper pumpkins and bats hung from the ceiling.

“Where is Pearl’s place, anyway?” Peridot asked, realizing she didn’t know where Pearl lived.

“She lives in the Temple. It’s Greg’s, but he prefers to stay in his van. Steven lives at the Temple, too.”

“Temple?”

“The big building near the ocean?”

Peridot’s jaw hung open. “ _That_ place?”

Lapis laughed, closing Peridot’s mouth by gently pushing her chin back up. “Yeah. Greg, Pearl, Garnet, and Amethyst, they all built it after Rose died. It took a while. Now Greg’s rich, but he’s kind of used to his van.”

“Oh.” 

“Well, Pearl technically lives in the house—the Temple is connected to it, and behind it, in the big hill. There’s a barn on top of that hill. It’s pretty cool.”

Peridot nodded.

Chilly air hit them. Peridot glanced at the hill, where Steven’s house was.

“I’ve never met Connie. What is she like?” Peridot asked.

Lapis smirked. “She’s nice. Kind of nerdy, like you—except she reads more books.”

“Like you.”

The blue-haired girl rolled her eyes. “According to Steven, swordfighting’s changed her.”

“Oh, right. Swordfighting.” 

They reached the Temple a few minutes later. It was a little more decorated than BCU—toilet paper rolls rolled down the roof, fake cobwebs were draped over the railing over the stairs, and Halloween-themed stickers were stuck on the open glass door.

Amethyst was adjusting Steven’s helmet. Peridot saw someone else, a girl who with dark brown skin and black hair tied into a braid, standing next to him.

Amethyst turned and saw Peridot. “P-dot!” she cried, hugging the stiff blonde.

“Hey, Amethyst.”

The girl—probably Connie—walked to Peridot and stuck her hand out. “I’m Connie,” she grinned. She had a soft voice.

“I’m Peridot,” said girl mumbled. 

Connie turned to Steven again. She was a little taller than him.

“If he’s supposed to be ninth grade, are you in tenth?”

Connie suppressed a laugh. “I’m in seventh.”

“Oh,” Peridot’s voice faltered, and she felt her cheeks flush in embarrassment.

Lapis ruffled Steven’s curly hair. “You ready?”

Steven nodded. “Heck yeah!”

Lapis giggled. “Come on, then.”

At that moment, Pearl burst out of a door. “Oh, you’re here! Are you going now? Lapis, why didn’t you wear shoes—”

“I told you,” Peridot whispered to Lapis, who acknowledged it by rolling her eyes. 

Pearl waved her hands around. “Well, if you’re going, bye. Lion and I will handle whoever comes here,” she pointed to a big bowl on the counter, filled with candy. “Be safe!”

Lapis nodded and headed out the door. Steven, Connie, Amethyst, and finally Peridot followed.

Peridot whispered to Amethyst, “You know your way around here, right? Because I kind of don’t.”

“Yeah, yeah. But you’ve been here for two months, dude! How?”

“I don’t get out much.”

The group trudged through the sand. When they hit pavement, Steven and Connie immediately ran to the first house they saw. Amethyst hurried after them, yelling, “I know the tricks! The candy-getting tricks!”

Lapis snorted. She had stuck her hands into her sweatshirt’s pocket. Her white shorts were still visible in the fading light.

“Okay, you’re right,” she sighed, turning slightly towards Peridot. “It’s kinda cold.”

Peridot grinned. “I thought you didn’t get cold?”

“Shut up,” Lapis said, nudging Peridot. “I know how to stay warm.”

“And how’s that, Miss Lazu—hey!”

Lapis had pulled the blonde towards her. Her slender arms slithered around Peridot’s waist. The shorter girl felt her roommate’s cold hands against her side. 

“There. Nice and warm.”

Peridot tried to stop blushing. “You’re lucky you’re my friend, Lazuli.”

“Oh?”

“I could inflict pain.”

“By what? Scraping my knees, shortie?”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “I’m 5”5.”

“That is _not_ an accomplishment.”

Peridot huffed, and Lapis snuggled closer. Peridot felt Lapis’ jaw press against the top of her head.

“We got the good stuff!” Amethyst grinned. Her smile faltered when she saw Peridot and Lapis, but she covered it up with a smirk.

“You guys are pretty close!” she said.

Peridot pushed herself away from Lapis as quickly as she could.

An hour or two later, the group had led itself through the entirety of Beach City (which Peridot was pretty sure didn’t qualify as a city) and had found itself at BCU.

“I think Sadie’s helping out here. To give out candy to everyone or whatever,” Lapis pointed at the building.

“Cool! I wanna see your room!” Steven grinned.

Connie placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “I don’t think they’ll let you.”

“Aww,” Steven groaned. Peridot was pretty sure they would, but it would be a hassle.

“Lapis! Peridot! Amethyst!” Peridot heard a voice call. She turned around. Jasper was waving from the side of the building.

Lapis grinned and dashed to kiss her girlfriend. Peridot smiled. It was good to see Jasper.

“Oh, hey, Peridot. Lapis,” someone else said from behind Jasper. Bismuth made herself visible.

“I thought you had a meeting?” Peridot asked.

“Yeah. It’s over,” the stocky, rainbow-haired girl grunted. “Nice to see you again, shortie.”

“Oh, hey Bis,” Lapis smiled. Peridot swore the blue-haired girl was blushing slightly. Whether it was because she had just kissed her girlfriend, or if it was just the sight of Bismuth, Peridot wasn’t sure. The blonde frowned.

Jasper eyed Amethyst, who had stuffed all her candy into a bag. “Can I have some?” she asked, grinning.

Amethyst pulled the bag closer. “What do I get?”

Peridot ignored the sisters and she walked to stand in front of Bismuth.

“I haven’t really met you,” she greeted.

Bismuth simpered. “I heard you liked building things?”

“Well…more _fixing_ things up.”

“I come from a family of builders,” Bismuth explained. She sighed. “I used to be interested in building weapons. Still am, but it proved to be dangerous, and I didn’t get a lot of money.”

Peridot nodded.

Bismuth continued, “I’m a builder, now, but I’ve started renovating a forge. Maybe I could teach people how to build weapons and armor or something.”

Peridot glanced at Lapis. The blue-haired girl was nervously looking at Bismuth. Peridot remembered what she had said—that she recognized her, and that Bismuth had been around Blue Diamond.

The look on Lapis’ face wasn’t a face of fright, though. It was something else. The blunette's cheeks were still slightly tinged pink.

“Oh, hey Lapis!” Bismuth beamed at her. “Long time no see!”

“Yeah,” Lapis nodded. Anxiousness filled her voice.

“Peridot!” Amethyst called. “You want some candy?”

Peridot turned to face her friend. “Uh, yeah, sure.”

Amethyst dumped a handful of treats into Peridot’s open arms. “Lapis!” the blonde cried. “Can you help?”

“C-coming,” Lapis murmured, striding towards her roommate and grabbing half of the candy.

“What was that all about?” Peridot whispered.

“Nothing, hush,” Lapis glared. “It doesn’t matter. Come on, let’s go. Bis said she’ll take Steven and Connie home while Amethyst was giving you this stuff.” A smile crossed her face again, and she popped a bright blue lollipop into her mouth.

Peridot rolled her eyes, but followed Lapis when she started towards the door of the university.

* * *

Peridot was watching an episode of Camp Pining Hearts when Lapis kicked open the door.

“Peridot!” the blue-haired girl whispered. “I have to show you something!”

From where Peridot sat, on her bed comfortably, she could only catch a glimpse of Lapis’ hair. Her roommate was waiting outside.

“Coming,” the blonde muttered, shoving her computer to the side.

“Ok, Peri, don’t be ma—”

Peridot yelped when she saw what Lapis was holding. “IS THAT A—”

“Shush!” Lapis whispered, covering Peridot’s mouth with her fingers quickly. “Do you want to get in trouble?”

In Lapis’ arms was a dog. A corgi.

A.

 _Corgi_.

Peridot pushed Lapis’ hand away. “Are you crazy? Where did you find it, anyway?”

“I found _Pumpkin_ —”

“You _named_ him?!”

“ _Her_. Pumpkin is a she. I dropped by a vet’s office when coming back from the hardware store. Pumpkin was all alone, in a corner…”

“Are you being sappy so I’ll keep the dog?”

“Yes. Is it working?”

Peridot sighed. “Sadly, yes. But she’s your responsibility, Lazuli.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Lapis pushed Peridot’s slipping glasses back up her nose.

“Hey!” Peridot cried, folding her arms as Lapis elbowed past her.

Lapis snorted. “Nerd.”

Pumpkin turned out to be mostly Peridot’s job. Lapis _tried_ to take care of her, but Peridot kept complaining that she was doing it wrong. Which ended in her taking care of Pumpkin most of the time.

Peridot and Lapis only told Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, and Steven about Pumpkin. In case they ever needed to leave her with one of them. They didn’t tell anyone else, because Peridot was sure that pets weren’t allowed in dorm rooms.

* * *

November had passed by quickly. For Thanksgiving, Lapis and Peridot head to Steven’s house to have dinner.

Nine courses of food and at least twenty bad jokes later (mostly conducted by Peridot), Thanksgiving was over. Steven’s uncle, Andy DeMayo, had been there. He was a little annoyed at the loud college kids, but had mostly kept his cool.

Peridot had finally met Greg. Laden with long hair, he was a pretty nice guy. He cared a lot for Steven, and was a better person than what Peridot thought he would be.

“Nice barn, huh?” Lapis asked, nudging Peridot as they were about to leave.

“Hm? Yeah, I guess.”

“We could own an entire farm here. With Pumpkin.”

“Lesbian farmers…”

“Pumpkin as our child…”

The roommates started laughing, both of them doubling over. Peridot wheezed harder as she heard Lapis’ snorts. Andy stared at them, confused.

“Lesbian farmers,” Lapis chuckled. She exhaled. “I can’t— _lesbian farmers out here living the best life_.”

Another round of laughter passed between the two of them.

“We should head back to our dorm,” Lapis hiccuped.

“Y-yeah...we...we should.”

Lapis grabbed Peridot’s hand. “Co-come on, nerd.”

* * *

“When does it start to snow here?”

“Uh, not until, like, late December, early January.”

“It’s going to snow. Later today.”

Amethyst jumped up. “No way! Awesome!”

Peridot grappled for her phone, which had flown out of her hands during Amethyst’s burst of excitement.

“Snow! P-dot, snow!” Amethyst grinned.

“Yeah. Snow.”

Peridot heard a knock on the door. “It’s open!” she answered.

The door swung open, showing Lapis in all her glory. “Why the hell is Amethyst screaming?” she asked.

“Snow!” Amethyst beamed.

“Whatever,” Lapis deadpanned under her breath, pushing past Amethyst and flopping down on her bed.

“Aw, man, you’re no fun, Lazuli!”

“Don’t call me Lazuli,” the blunette muttered.

“ _Peridot_ calls you Lazuli.”

Lapis rolled her eyes and didn’t answer.

Amethyst glared at her for a few seconds before she continued her rant. “I’ve gotta tell Pearl and Steven! Oh, boy, we’re going to have so much fun…” Amethyst kept talking as she walked out of Peridot’s dorm.

“I’ve never seen anyone get this excited about snow,” Peridot noted.

“Really?”

“My mom wasn’t a fan of it.”

Lapis turned on to her stomach and faced Peridot. “Your mom, huh?”

Peridot turned away.

“I mean…you don’t have to talk about her or anything.”

Silence.

“My mother…is interesting.” 

Peridot knew there was a smirk on Lapis’ face, without even turning around. She did turn around, though, just so her roommate could hear her more clearly.

“Mmhmm…” Lapis pretended not to be interested, but it was clear that she was hooked.

A smug smile sat on Peridot’s face, until she remembered what she was talking about. “My mother…is the vice CEO of Homeworld Incorporated.”

Lapis eyes grew. “Your mo—you must be _loaded_!”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “Yes, okay. You already know I have a lot of money. Or at least, I _used_ to.”

Lapis turned around, so she was on her back, but kept her eyes on Peridot. “What do you mean?”

“My mother disagreed with my choice to pursue mechanical engineering, as you might know. She wanted me to be the next vice CEO—the actual CEO, even, of Homeworld Incorporated. Alas, we had a fight.”

“Oh? Who were your henchmen?”

Peridot flung a pillow towards Lapis, which resulted in her having a giggling fit.

“It was a _verbal_ fight. And not in person. I said engineering had its benefits, she didn’t care and said I _didn’t know better_ or some shit like that—so I said that _I_ probably knew more than _her_ and called her a clod. She made this weird face—” Peridot scrunched her facial features, causing Lapis to laugh, “And I cut the phone. I haven’t talked to her again, but she’s after me.”

“What did she do? Did she send her henchman after you?”

“Uh, yeah!”

“Oh,” Lapis paused. “How’d you get out of that one?”

“I don’t remember,” Peridot groaned. “But it sucked. Anyway, my point is—my mother is a sociopath, maybe even a straight-up psychopath—and she never let me be normal! My childhood was bad. Really bad.”

Lapis smiled, distracted. “We should have a contest. For who has the suckiest childhood. Pretty sure I would win, but you never know—”

“Lapis, that’s not what I meant—”

“I know, nerd,” Lapis said, a soft smile on her lips as she got up and tousled Peridot’s hair. “But, hey, I think it started to snow. Wanna have a snowball fight or something?”

“A snowball fight? I haven’t had one of those—ever.”

Lapis gave a small gasp. “ _Never_? And I thought you were a woman of culture, Peridot Diamond.” She intertwined her fingers with Peridot’s. “Come on. We need to get you to a snowball fight, asap.”

Peridot, bundled up in a heavy coat, a hat, gloves, and a striped, green-and-yellow scarf, waddled out of the university’s backdoor, accompanied by Lapis and Pumpkin. Her roommate was right—it had started to snow lightly, the soft whte covering the grass. Next, the falling became more rugged and stronger, until a blanket covered the entirety of the field.

“Perfect,” Lapis grinned. Her hands dug into the cold substance, and produced a perfectly round ball.

“So are we doing that thing where everyone gets in teams and has a plan and a fort and—”

“We’re the only ones around, dork,” Lapis laughed.

“Whatever. I wanted to be on the other team, anyway,” Peridot muttered, which was very _not_ true. Peridot was pretty sure Lapis could beat her at the art snowball fighting.

“Sure you did,” Lapis rolled her eyes. “What do you want if you win?”

Peridot thought about it for a moment. “If you’re going to be an insomniac,” Peridot pointed out, talking about how Lapis took forever to go to sleep, “you have to try some coffee.”

“I’m not touching that bitter muck.”

“I choose the prize, Lazuli.”

Lapis huffed. “Fine. Whatever. I’ll probably beat you anyway.”

Peridot’s victory grin was interrupted with a snowball shot to the side. “Hey!” she cried, picking up a clump of snow with her stubby, gloved hands.

Pumpkin barked, panting. Peridot maneuvered around her and flung a—for a lack of better words—clod of snow at her roommate.

“How do you even win this game?” Peridot asked when the snow hit Lapis.

“When the other person gives up or is soaked!” Lapis answered, throwing two snowballs at Peridot.

Peridot managed to dodge one, making it fly over her shoulder, but the other other hit her square in the stomach.

“Lazuli!” she groaned, flicking her own snowball towards the blunette. Lapis veered away.

“You suck at throwing,” Lapis snickered, throwing a snowball at Peridot’s legs, causing the blonde’s knees to buckle.

“W-woah!” Peridot face planted into the snow. Her glasses started slipping off her nose, and she pushed them back up. 

Suddenly, a shadow surrounded her. Peridot looked up to face her doom: a smirking Lapis holding a whole lot of snow.

“Aa—no!” Peridot yelled as Lapis dropped the snow on her. “You clod!”

Pumpkin yipped and licked Peridot’s face.

Lapis giggled. “Now you’re _definitely_ soaked.”

Peridot grumbled something under her breath. She looked up at her roommate. “What’s your prize?”

“You better get me something good for my birthday.”

“Your birthday?!”

“Yeah. It’s tomorrow. The twelfth of December.”

Peridot stumbled up. “I would’ve done that anyway, Lapis!” she huffed softly.

“I know you would,” Lapis smiled sweetly. She picked up Pumpkin and walked back inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also posts are going to be more sporadic now


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Lapis' birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating! This chapter is a little short.

Lapis’ birthday.

What would she get for Lapis’ birthday?

Peridot ran her fingers through her hair, pacing the tiny dormitory. Lapis had a class, so the blonde was the only one in the room, left alone with her crowding thoughts.

_Her birthday is tomorrow! I have less than twenty-four hours to figure this out…_

_What does Lapis like, anyway?_

_Blue! I should get something blue…_

Peridot slumped on to her bed, taking a deep breath. She was thinking way too hard about this.

_Steven! He would know what to do!_

Peridot grinned, pulling her phone out.

 **_Peridot:_ ** _steven! what do i get for lazuli’s birthday?_

A few minutes later, Steven replied:

 **_Steven:_ ** _idk get Lapis a lapis lazuli_

Peridot groaned.

 **_Peridot:_ ** _very funny, steven. im being serious here_

Get Lapis Lazuli a lapis lazuli for her birthday. What a _genius_ idea. Peridot held the urge to roll her eyes.

 **_Steven:_ ** _so am i!! get her a lapis lazuli necklace or something_

Peridot squinted at the screen of her phone. A necklace. That…wasn’t a bad idea.

* * *

“ _Lazuli_ ,” Peridot called in a sing-song voice. She nudged her roommate.

“What?” Lapis groaned, shoving her face deeper into her pillow.

“It’s your birthday!” Peridot grinned.

Lapis turned around a little, so Peridot had a glimpse of her deep blue eyes. “Okay, so?”

Peridot pouted. “Don’t you want to see my gift?”

“Your gif—Peridot, I was kidding! You didn’t have to—”

Peridot shushed her and fumbled with something in her pocket. The shorter girl produced a small, rectangular box tied with a blue ribbon.

“See—the ribbon is even blue! I got yo’ number!”

“Peridot, I didn’t—”

“Here, let me unwrap it for you,” Peridot grinned, undoing the blue ribbon. She lifted the cover and handed the box to Lapis.

The blue-haired girl peered inside. She pulled out the necklace, gasping.

“I love it!” she smiled. “You really didn’t have to…”

“I…I wanted to,” Peridot smiled back.

Lapis tousled her roommate’s hair. “I’m going to brush my teeth. You better help me put this on.”

Peridot smirked. “You require assistance from Peridot Diamond?”

“Oh, shut up.”

Peridot glanced at the necklace as Lapis left. It was simple, a thin chain with a lapis lazuli pendant.

“You’re not going to take that for yourself, are you?” a voice asked. Peridot whipped her head around. Lapis was leaning on the doorframe.

How long had Peridot been staring at the necklace?

“Uh—uh, no,” Peridot stuttered.

The blunette laughed, perambulating towards the bed. She swiftly picked up the necklace, attempting to put it on.

“A little help here?” Lapis asked, pointing at her neck.

“Oh, uh, right,” Peridot stood up, grabbing the ends of the necklace. Lapis pushed her blue hair up, and Peridot clicked the ends together.

“There! It looks great, Laz,” Peridot beamed.

Lapis smiled, murmuring something under her breath.

“Where now, Lapis?” Peridot asked, tugging on her roommate’s arm.

Lapis adjusted Peridot’s wiry glasses. “The Big Donut?”

“Yeah!”

Peridot pulled Lapis out the door.

“You’re going to have the best day ever!” she grinned.

“You forgot your jacket,” Lapis laughed, making Peridot stop.

“Oh, right.”

* * *

Peridot pushed open the door to the Big Donut. “What do you want?” she whispered to Lapis.

“Iced tea,” the blunette answered.

“ _Iced_ tea? It’s like forty degrees outside!”

“That’s not cold. At all.”

The blonde rolled her eyes, but pulled out a few dollar bills. “I’m getting myself some coffee.”

“Ew,” Lapis replied. “And let me pay!”

“It’s my treat!”

“You already got me the necklace!”

“That was _also_ my treat!”

Lapis rolled her eyes, grinning nevertheless. “Fine. But I’m paying next time.”

“Are you proposing there will be a next time, Lazuli?”

Lapis shoved Peridot playfully. “Shut up and get me some iced tea.”

* * *

“It’s almost the holidays!” Amethyst yelled, flinging herself on to Peridot’s bed.

“Oh stars…” Peridot muttered.

“Are you going home for the holidays?” Amethyst asked, turning around. She had an idea of what Peridot’s mom was like.

“No. Absolutely not,” Peridot shuddered. “I’ll be staying here. I’m pretty sure Lapis won’t go either, so I won’t be alone.”

“Why wouldn’t Lapis go?” Amethyst asked.

Peridot paused. “She has her reasons.”

Amethyst shrugged, but Peridot could tell the Latina wanted to know more. Lapis was distant from the rest of Peridot’s friends. The blue-haired girl had warmed herself up to Amethyst a little, though, probably because of their similar personalities—but they were still completely different, with Amethyst being loud and extroverted, and Lapis tending to stay quiet.

Peridot was pretty sure her roommate didn’t fully trust any of them. The blonde wasn’t sure if Lapis trusted _her_.

“You guys can hang with us,” Amethyst beamed.

Peridot grinned. “Really? Great! Are you guys going to celebrate the holidays together?”

“Like every year. Me, Pearl, Garnet, Steven, and Greg,” Amethyst explained. “Bismuth comes sometimes too.”

“What about Jasper?”

“She doesn’t really do this family stuff. Plus, she goes back to Empire City for the holidays and stuff.”

“Oh. Right.”

The door swung open, revealing a tired Lapis. “Why is it that every time I come in I hear Amethyst yelling about something?”

“It’s better than coming in and seeing you two wrapped up in a blanket watching that shitty 90’s sitcom,” Amethyst smirked, which earned a glare from the blue-haired girl.

“For you information,” Peridot retorted, “ _Camp Pining Hearts_ is very _icon_ —”

“ _Li’l Butler_ is _way_ better,” Amethyst countered. “Me and Greg binge-watch it all the time.”

Peridot was about to answer, but before she could, Lapis interrupted. “What are you guys doing for the holidays?”

Amethyst spun around. “We’re having a party! At the Temple! You guys better come.”

“Of course we will—”

“I have plans—”

Peridot looked at Lapis, who mirrored the action. “Why won’t we go?” Peridot asked.

“I—” Lapis turned her head away.

Amethyst got up. “Uh…well, I—there’s still some time! You guys can figure it out,” she laughed weakly, and dashed out the door.

“Peridot…I don’t like going to holiday parties. You can go if you want, though,” Lapis explained.

“I want you to go too!” Peridot answered. She walked up to the blunette and placed a hand on her shoulder. “Why don’t you want to go?”

Lapis stared at the floor, unable to look Peridot in the eye. “I don’t like going to events that…represent family. And stuff.”

“You went to the Thanksgiving thing.”

“That was different,” Lapis sat down. “I used to celebrate Thanksgiving with my friends. But they always left around the holidays. I was left alone with my parents, who didn’t care about me all!”

Peridot sat down next to Lapis. “This time, you’re with your friends.”

Lapis looked at the blonde, sighing. “I guess…I guess I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alsooo shameless plug but uh follow me on twitter where i post art and stuff: https://twitter.com/theskrtskrt


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot and Lapis go to Steven's place for Christmas and everyone gets mad at Peridot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so sorry for not updating  
> i was busy freaking out about she-ra season 5 WHICH YOU SHOULD TOTALLY WATCH

“How come you and Jasper don’t hang out more?” Peridot asked, tugging on her sweatshirt.

Lapis bit her lip. “What do you mean?” she asked, uncomfortable.

“I dunno…I just don’t see you two together that often. And when you are together, one of you is normally whispering something suggestive in the other’s ear.”

Lapis pushed her bangs out of the way. “We’re _alone_ , then, Peridot. Of course you don’t see us.”

Peridot was pretty sure her roommate was only half telling the truth, but she shrugged it off. It wasn’t her business. As much as she wanted to know.

“When do Amethyst and Pearl want us to arrive, again?” Lapis asked, obviously trying to push Peridot’s question away.

Peridot pulled out her phone to check the time. “In three minutes. We should hurry.”

The blonde threw on a jacket and rushed out the door. Lapis followed her, fidgeting and checking the time.

“Why are you so nervous?” Peridot whispered as the roommates hit chilly air.

“I don’t like the holidays,” Lapis muttered, waving it off. “It doesn’t matter. You better have fun.”

“Only if you enjoy yourself as well.”

“I can’t make any promises.”

Peridot rolled her eyes and tugged on her roommate’s sleeve. “C’mon, hurry up.”

“You’re the one asking annoying questions!”

Peridot led Lapis through the confusing array of streets that she had finally figured out. The Temple came into sight soon, and the blunette and the blonde walked faster.

“So…it’s Christmas Eve,” Peridot said.

“You better not get me something amazing again,” Lapis answered, fingering her necklace.

“Bold of you to assume I got you something,” Peridot grinned, receiving a shove from her roommate.

“Well, it doesn’t matter if you got me something, because I got you something.”

“It better be as good as my gift!”

Lapis rolled her eyes, but smiled.

“This is kind of my first proper Christmas,” Peridot sighed. “My mother didn’t really celebrate it.”

“Yay, we can celebrate our first Christmases together,” Lapis deadpanned, earning a laugh from the blonde.

“I am an atheist.”

“Me too. You can still celebrate Christmas, dork. Just not religiously.”

“That’s not what I meant—”

“Then why’d you bring it up?”

“I don’t know! We were just talking about Christmas and…”

“Right…”

“Well…” Peridot looked at the light cover of snow on the sand. “My mom was always working. We never got time for that kind of thing.”

“Oh.”

The blonde stood next to the blunette for a few seconds, before turning towards the Temple and exclaiming, “Well, we’re here!”

Lapis trudged past Peridot, whispering something under her breath.

Before either of them could knock, the door swung open, revealing a grinning Amethyst with a fretting Pearl behind her.

“Oh, good, you’re here,” Pearl said as Amethyst grabbed Peridot’s arm and pulled her in.

“P’s been worrying the whole day,” Amethyst explained in a low voice.

“Why?” Peridot whispered back, to which Amethyst shrugged.

Out of the corner of her eye, Peridot could see Lapis move towards Jasper. The blonde smiled.

“Hey, P-dot, wanna grab some punch?” Amethyst asked.

Peridot frowned. “You haven’t spiked it, have you?”

“I mean…” Amethyst glanced at Steven, who was chatting with Garnet. “I can if you want me to,” she smirked, her hand reaching for her back pocket.

“N-no, that’s okay,” Peridot laughed nervously. “So, uh, who else is coming?”

“Well, Pearl, Garnet, Steven, and Greg were obviously coming,” Amethyst replied, motioning towards them carelessly. “Pearl invited Bis, who invited Jasper. I wanted you to come, and it made sense for Lapis to come, since Jasper and you were coming.”

“Wait,” Peridot stopped her. “Jasper didn’t invite her? Who brought it up, then?”

Amethyst blinked. “I did.”

Peridot glanced at the blue-haired girl. Lapis was happy with Jasper, right?

Why did the blunette seem so uncomfortable?

“Hey, Amethyst, I think I should check on Lapis,” Peridot mumbled.

The lilac-haired girl gave the blonde a tight smile. “Lapis is fine. She’s with Jasper.”

“I don’t thi—”

“Stop worrying so much!” Amethyst shoved her hand in front of Peridot to stop her from moving. Anger poured into her words. “Everything’s fine! Loosen up! Lapis is fine! Stop being so clingy!”

“I’m not clingy!” Peridot answered, flushing.

“Then don’t talk to Lapis. The entire night,” Amethyst glared at her. “Just, hang out with me.”

Peridot flashed back to when she had talked to Jasper. Lapis hadn’t seemed close to her. She had walked out the door as fast as she could. But why? Didn’t she _like_ Jasper?

“Amethyst, I’m being serious,” Peridot retorted. “Is she eating enough? I don’t think—”

“Oh my god!” Amethyst yelled. “Stop being such a mom! You have other friends, you know!”

A pregnant pause filled the room.

“Amethyst?” Pearl asked wearily. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” the Latina muttered, turning away from Peridot.

“Amethyst, wait, I—” Peridot started, but Amethyst had already started walking away from her.

The blonde pushed past Pearl to catch up with her friend. She slid past Lapis.

“Are you guys okay?” The blunette asked.

“We’re fine,” Peridot grumbled.

Amethyst pushed herself out the door. Peridot followed her outside hastily.

“Wait,” the blonde breathed.

The lavender-haired girl stopped and whipped her head around. “What?”

“Look, I’m sorry,” Peridot mumbled. “I was just worried.”

“No, it’s not your fault,” Amethyst sighed, looking down. “Jasper has been acting a little weird whenever I bring up Lapis.”

Silence passed over the two.

“You don’t think…they’re not going to break up, right?” Peridot asked quietly.

“I don’t know,” Amethyst answered, a solemn tone in her voice.

“Oh.”

* * *

“So, what was that about?” Lapis asked Peridot as she took a sip from her punch-filled solo cup.

“What do you mean?” Peridot asked.

Lapis rolled her eyes. “Amethyst barging out? You guys were mad at each other or something?”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Peridot answered, crossing her arms.

Lapis snorted. “Yeah, right.”

“Well, what about you and Jasper?” the blonde retorted.

The smile on Lapis’ face fell, making Peridot instantly regret what she said.

“We’re fine,” Lapis answered, taciturn.

Peridot fidgeted with her fingers as silence spread over them. “Anyway.” 

“I need to go to the bathroom,” Lapis answered hollowly. She strided towards Steven.

“Lapis, wait—”

The blue-haired girl had already gone.

* * *

“Where’s the mistletoe?” Amethyst grumbled as she looked at the doorways.

“Why do you want mistletoe?” Peridot asked.

“Might help me finally get a girlfriend,” Amethyst sighed. “And get you one, too.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “I’m not just going to automatically fall in love with someone because I kissed them.”

“I know…but still,” Amethyst replied, her eyes darting towards Pearl, who was towards the center of the room. The freshmen were stuck in a corner.

Peridot tried not to laugh. “This is about Pearl, isn’t it?”

“What?” Amethyst yelped. “I have no idea what you mean, I—”

“Could you _be_ more obvious? the blonde chuckled.

“I don’t like Pearl!” Amethyst whispered loudly. “Now shush.”

The blonde rolled her eyes, but decided to change the conversation. “I can’t believe we’re almost half-way done with the school year,” she sighed.

“You sound like such a nerd.”

“I _am_ a nerd, Amethyst.”

“Cheer up, Peri. It’s Christmas!”

“Christmas Eve.”

“Whatever,” Amethyst scoffed.

“Hey, Peridot,” a voice called from behind. The blonde turned around to find Lapis leaning on the doorframe.

“Yeah?”

“Can I talk to you for a moment? In, uh, private.”

Peridot shrugged, looking at Amethyst. The lilac-haired girl nodded hesitantly, and left the two alone in the corner.

“Is this about the…you know,” Peridot mumbled, gesturing towards Jasper.

“Look,” Lapis snapped. “Me and Jasper are fine. We’re just…arguing. About something.”

“Is it your swimming lessons?”

“What?”

“I—well, I noticed you weren’t going to them lately. To your swimming lessons.”

Lapis fidgeted, looking away. “I don’t want to talk about it,” she breathed.

“Okay,” Peridot nodded.

She couldn’t help but feel disappointed that her best friend, who would tell her everything, wouldn’t tell her about her relationship.

* * *

“Bye, Steven,” Peridot smiled. It was almost 1AM.

“Bye,” Lapis murmured to him, pulling him into a hug.

“Merry Christmas!” the curly-haired boy grinned.

Peridot and Lapis walked silently back to their dorm.

“I’m sorry,” Lapis mumbled. “About earlier.”

“What do you mean?”

“I snapped at you. You were just trying to help me. I just…don’t want to talk about it. We’ll be fine.”

“I understand,” Peridot said under her breath.

* * *

Peridot woke up to scads of _pings!_ from her phone, all saying _Merry Christmas!_ and whatnot.

Peridot didn’t have many contacts in her phone, but Lapis’ probably did, because her _pings!_ went on even longer.

“Ugh,” she moaned into her pillow. “I have to say ‘thank you’ to so many people now. You didn’t send anything to me, right?”

“I get to see you when I wake up, Lazuli. I don’t think I have to.”

Lapis yawned but got up.

“Have you been getting enough sleep?” Peridot asked wearily.

“Yeah,” Lapis murmured, but her roommate was one hundred percent sure she was lying.

Pumpkin barked, pawing at the little tree they had placed on the desk.

“Oh, shit,” Lapis muttered. “I didn’t put my gift there.”

“Just pull it out now,” Peridot answered lazily. “Or, after we brush our teeth and stuff.”

Half an hour later, both Peridot and Lapis were ready.

“I’ll go first,” Lapis smiled, pulling something out from under her bed. “This is for Pumpkin.”

Pumpkin yipped.

“Oh, frick, I didn’t get anything for Pumpkin,” Peridot stammered.

“That’s because I’m the more responsible owner,” Lapis answered matter-of-factly, ripping her present open. Inside was a bag of dog treats.

“ _Sure_ you are.” 

“Anyway,” Lapis laughed. “I got you some _Camp Pining Hearts_ video games.”

Peridot’s eyes widened and she gasped. “ _There are_ Camp Pining Hearts _video games?_ ” she grinned excitedly.

“Apparently,” Lapis shrugged.

“You didn’t get this off the black market, did you?”

Lapis snorted. “Shut up and take it. No, I didn’t.”

Peridot squealed, shoving it under her pillow. “You’re the best, Lapis!”

Her blue-haired roommate smiled.

Peridot scrambled under her bed. “Here,” she said, pulling out a rectangular box.

Lapis took the present, ripping it open. She gasped.

Peridot beamed. “New watercolors!”

The blonde felt herself being pulled into a hug. Lapis’ warm arms wrapped around her back.

“I love it,” Lapis whispered into Peridot’s ear, her voice shaking.

“I’m glad,” Peridot smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've forgotten how human interactions work someone help
> 
> also is it blunette or bluenette??? according to urban dictionary both are correct so im sticking with blunette


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis and Peridot do stuff together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay the summary is really vague but i swear its not sexual

“Break ends in a few days,” Peridot murmured tiredly.

“Yeah,” Lapis sighed. “There goes sleeping late and not waking up to stupid alarms.”

“I find my alarms very entertaining.”

“Paulette screaming is very entertaining?”

Peridot crossed her arms. “I like hearing her pain.”

Lapis laughed lazily. “Of course.”

They were both on their respective beds, Peridot laying down and staring at the ceiling, Lapis slumped against the wall her bed was abutting. Moonlight streamed through the window on Peridot’s side of the room. Her alarm clock read the time, 11:02PM.

Patches of melting snow could be seen outside. A splatter of stars was in the dark, brooding sky. Peridot often picked out constellations as she fell asleep.

“Tomorrow’s New Year’s Eve,” Peridot said, breaking the short silence that had blanketed the dorm.

“You haven’t been invited to another party, have you?”

“Nice joke. As if  _ I _ would be invited.”

“Amethyst would invite you to hers.”

Peridot’s fingers fidgeted. “She’s probably busy or something.”

“Whatever,” Lapis breathed out, shifting so she was on her side, turned away from her roommate and parallel to the bed.

“We could do something together,” Peridot said.

“Sure…” Lapis answered, drifting off to sleep.

* * *

Peridot woke up ten minutes later.

“Peridot!” Lapis whispered, nudging the blonde.

“What the hell?” Peridot cried. She glared at her blue-haired roommate. “I thought you went to sleep!”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Lapis answered, rolling her eyes. “How did you get the CPH episodes?”

“I downloaded them.”

“From where?”

Peridot groaned into her pillow. “I don’t remember—I did it a while ago.”

“Whatever,” Lapis muttered, turning towards her bed. “Do you mind if I turn the lights on?”

“Yes!”

“Hmph!”

Peridot heard the blunette scramble back on to her bed.

* * *

Peridot woke up again by being poked in the face.

“You awake, P-dot?”

Peridot yelped. “Amethyst?”

“And Bismuth and Pearl!” the Latina grinned, pointing backwards towards the juniors.

“What’s the time?” the blonde groaned into her pillow.

“Eleven. You slept for a  _ while _ .”

Peridot turned around. “That’s only because Lazuli kept waking up! How long did you sleep?” she asked, glaring daggers at her roommate.

“I dunno, like four hours?” Lapis shrugged.

“I thought we were going to do something together,” Peridot grumbled, getting up and heading towards the door to go to the bathroom.

“They kind of barged in!” the blue-haired girl answered as Peridot left.

The blonde returned a few minutes later. She pulled on a dark green sweatshirt and groaned, sitting on her bed.

“Today’s the last day of the year!” Bismuth boomed, waving her arms around. “Tomorrow, it’ll be a…new year!”

“I didn’t know that,” Peridot sighed, rolling her eyes.

Lapis was sitting on her own bed, accompanied by a distracted Pearl.

“What’s on your mind?” Peridot asked, looking at Pearl.

“What? Huh? Oh, nothing,” the lanky woman fidgeted, laughing nervously.

Amethyst perked up. “Oh! What if we head to Empire City and watch the ball drop—”

“No!” Peridot and Lapis yelled at the same time. A flush appeared on both their cheeks.

Amethyst narrowed her eyes at both of them. “Okay…” 

“Peridot wouldn’t have anyone to kiss at midnight, anyway,” Bismuth grinned. The blush on Peridot’s face got darker.

Amethyst looked away. “Yeah…okay…anyway.”

Peridot leaned back on the wall next to her bed. 

“What if we just…watched a movie or something?” Lapis asked.

Peridot’s eyes widened. “Yeah! We could watch the _ Camp Pining Hearts _ movie—”

“ _ There’s a  _ Camp Pining Hearts  _ movie and you never told me _ ?” Lapis gaped.

“Uh, no,” Pearl dismissed the thought. “A different movie, please.”

“What about  _ Dogcopter 7 _ ? Steven said it was good,” Amethyst suggested.

Bismuth sighed. “Sounds better than  _ Camp Pining Hearts _ .”

Peridot put her hand on her chest dramatically and gasped. “For your information—”

“Okay, we’re watching  _ Dogcopter.  _ That’s final,” Pearl declared, standing up. “No objections.”

“ _ Someone’s _ being serious,” Bismuth smirked, her eyes half-lidded.

“Oh, hush,” Pearl muttered, blushing.

Amethyst stood up quickly. “Anyway! We can all go to the Temple at ten-ish and watch it there! Hey, maybe Steven can join! And then we’ll watch the ball drop and stuff at twelve.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Bismuth beamed. She turned around and pointed at the door with her thumb. “We should get going.”

“Okay, but you can drop in at any time,” Lapis mumbled, looking at Bismuth.

Once the others had left, Peridot turned towards Lapis. “ _ You can drop in at any time _ ?”

“I was just being polite,” Lapis retorted, blushing.

“You’re blushing too much.”

“You’re one to talk.”

Peridot huffed, getting up. “Do you think all the stores are closed?”

Lapis shrugged. “Probably. Why?”

“Oh, well, I…” Peridot blushed. “We could still do something together.”

“I have several ideas,” Lapis grinned mischievously.

“Oh no.”

* * *

“Okay, one, when did you get those seeds?” Peridot asked, pointing at the seed packet in Lapis’ hands. She had pulled it out from underneath her pillow, where she seemed to stash an endless amount of things.

“Steven gave them to me. For my birthday,” the blunette explained. “What’s your second question?”

“It’s the middle of winter,” Peridot answered. “How is it supposed to grow?”

“Steven said it was an indoor plant. Plus, it’ll take a while to grow.”

“I didn’t think you would take the farmer thing seriously,” Peridot said, inspecting the packet. “I have absolutely no experience.”

“I thought you were ‘The Great and Lovable Peridot’?”

Peridot flushed. “I—well—”

Lapis giggled. “Come on. I have some soil—”

“When did you get soil?”

“—and a pot. We’re planting this thing.”

Peridot sighed, taking the packet. Lapis rummaged through some stuff she had kept in a bag under her bed, (“Are you sure there isn’t a dead body in there?” “Shut up, nerd.”), and pulled out a pot and a small bag of soil.

“Is that enough soil?” Peridot asked skeptically, eyeing the small bag.

“Pfft, yeah. I think.”

The blonde raised her eyebrows, ripping open the seed packet.

“Okay, I think we add a little bit of soil first,” Lapis mumbled, opening the soil bag. She poured in a few inches of dirt.

Peridot looked into the pot. Lapis told her to push the seed in, which the blonde did very slowly. Then, Lapis poured in the rest of the soil.

“We didn’t put in too deep, right?” Peridot asked, poking at the dirt.

“We put less on top, so I’m sure it’s fine,” the blue-haired girl answered. She stood up, reached over Peridot’s bed, and placed the pot on the windowsill.

“Hey!” Peridot cried. “Who said you could put it there?”

“I did. Now I’m going to get some water for the plant from the bathroom.”

Peridot grumbled something under her breath but didn’t move the pot from the windowsill at all. Whenever Pumpkin barked and tried to climb on to the bed and touch it, the blonde pushed her away.

Lapis returned a few minutes later, holding a cup full of water. Peridot was pretty sure it was too much, but before she could say anything, Lapis dumped all the water in the cup into the pot.

“That’s too much water.”

“Oh well.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “You said you had  _ several  _ ideas?”

Lapis turned around. “Hm? Oh yeah. Let’s paint!”

“Wait, what?” Peridot blinked.

“C’mon, it’ll be  _ fun _ .”

“You’re the one taking art! I’m not doing—”

“Art is my minor! It’s not like I’m going to grow up and be an artist or anything.”

Peridot paused. “You aren’t?”

Lapis shook her head. “I need to get a diploma for oceanography.”

“I—” Peridot looked down. “Oh.”

Lapis stuck her hand out, and Peridot took it, being pulled up. “We’re going to the art room.”

“Are we allowed to?”

Lapis rolled her eyes and didn’t answer, instead pulling out her blue notebook (from under her pillow, of course) and heading out the door, tugging Peridot out with her.

* * *

The art room was a lot smaller than Peridot’s lecture halls. It was a little bit bigger than the art room in Peridot’s elementary school. Once middle school had started, Peridot had gone to a private school, where the art program was mostly neglected, so the blonde didn’t really remember what an art room was supposed to look like. Whatever it was, the art room at BCU was one hundred percent more…artsy.

“Okay, what do you want to paint from here?” Lapis asked, closing the door and handing her roommate the notebook. Peridot fluttered through the pages, gaping at all the sketches.

“Wow, these are…”

“Shut up,” the blue-haired girl blushed. “Just choose one.”

Peridot pointed at one of the Barn, the one that was on top of the hill the Temple was connected to.

“Okay, let’s see…”

“You’re so good at art, Lapis.”

“I call it ‘meep morp,’” Lapis beamed. She grabbed a brush and dabbed it into the water.

The paintbrush glided over the paper, adding color wherever it went. Peridot only stared, not able to look away. She didn’t know how long she was staring, because the next thing she knew, Lapis was done with the background, it had dried, and now the blunette was asking Peridot to do the Barn itself.

“Wait, what? Me?” Peridot snapped out of her trance.

“You said you make fanart or something, right?”

“This isn’t fanart!”

“ _ Please _ ? At least try. Here, I’ll help you.”

The blue-haired girl slipped the paintbrush into Peridot’s hand, and then covered the pale hand with her own tan one. She guided Peridot in making simple lines.

“Are they straight enough?”

“ _ Yes _ , Peridot.”

The blonde got the hang of it quickly, and was soon adding details by herself. Something she knew how to do.

When she was finished, the blonde stepped back. The Barn looked a little out of place, since it was in a different art style, but somehow it made the painting look even better.

“See?” Lapis grinned. “It wasn’t that hard.”

“Yeah…” Peridot responded softly.

Lapis picked up a thin paintbrush, and quickly dappled it in white paint. “Now we have to sign our names.” She scribbled something quickly in the corner.

“That’s a nice signature,” Peridot stammered. The L’s were longer and more refined than the rest of the letters, and the white paint looked good on the dark green.

Lapis handed her the paintbrush. The blonde crept close to the paper, inspecting it. How would she sign her name?

Peridot smiled, knowing what to do.

Lapis blinked. “Did you just sign…with an alien head?”

Peridot grinned. “Only the finest.”

The blunette laughed.

_ Knock, knock _ .

“Is someone there?” a voice called out from outside, causing Peridot to jump.

“Uh,” Lapis frantically grasped at the paper.

“Are there  _ two _ of you? You better be decent!”

Both Lapis and Peridot blushed. Lapis strided towards the door, opening it. “We were just painting,” she muttered.

“Oh!” the person said. He was a little shorter than Lapis, and his skin was tan like hers. His hair stuck out in the front, and Peridot was pretty sure she had seen him in the acting classes. “Uh, well…”

“We’re leaving, anyway. Come on, Peridot.”

Peridot grinned nervously and followed Lapis out.

* * *

As soon as she walked into the room, Lapis burst out laughing.

The blush on Peridot’s face deepened.

“We should hang this painting up,” Lapis suggested. “Over my bed or something.”

“Sure,” Peridot sighed. “That was a close call.”

“What do you mean?”

“What if it was a teacher or something?”

Lapis rolled her eyes. “We’d be fine. Everyone here is so laid-back.”

Peridot climbed on to her bed. “Why don’t you take art as your major?”

Lapis grabbed a thumbtack from a box under—you guessed it—her pillow. “I want to see what kind of shit is under the sea. And I like swimming and stuff,” she shrugged. “What’s the time?”

Peridot looked over to her clock. “It’s four o’ clock. How is it already four o’ clock?”

“We were painting for a while,” Lapis deadpanned.

“I’m hungry now,” Peridot sighed. “Is Fish Stew Pizza open?”

“I think so.”

“I’m getting a few slices. Are you coming?”

Lapis sighed. “Why not?”

* * *

Peridot swallowed the last of her pizza.

Lapis gazed at the counter. “Now what?”

Peridot thought for a second. “Well, we’ve been doing random things  _ you’ve _ come up with all day. So now we have to do what  _ I  _ want.”

“Which is?”

The blonde grinned. “ _ Camp Pining Hearts  _ marathon!”

Lapis gave Peridot a brief smile before standing up. “Yay,” she said apathetically.

“I thought you liked CPH!”

“I do,” she snorted. “But I’m pretty sure we’re on the Percy-pines-over-Paulette arc.”

Peridot stood up. “That means the Pierre arc is coming soon!”

“I guess so.”

* * *

Lapis yelped when she heard the alarm.

They were both on Peridot’s bed, watching  _ Camp Pining Hearts _ like they normally do, when the blonde’s phone started going off.

“Relax, it’s just the alarm I put on, to know when to get ready and stuff,” Peridot explained. “It’s nine thirty.”

“You put an alarm? And it’s nine thirty? How long have we been sitting here?” Lapis blinked.

“A while,” Peridot sighed.

The roommates stumbled out the door after pulling on their jackets. They reached the temple quickly, and were greeted by a Garnet and a still-nervous Pearl.

“Woah, Pearl, chill,” Amethyst said from the kitchen.

“Is that your TV?” Lapis asked, narrowing her eyes at a small box on top of the loft. “Also, how the hell are we supposed to all fit up there?”

“Oh, uh…” Amethyst faltered. “I didn’t…we didn’t think that far.”

“I think we can fit!” Steven called from up there.

Garnet leaned on the counter. “Steven invited me, but I don’t need to go up there. I’ve already watched it with him.”

“Oh, yes, when  _ Lapis _ was supposed to babysit him,” Pearl glared at the blunette.

Lapis mumbled something about swimming lessons and how ninth graders didn’t even need babysitters and how Pearl was  _ way _ too overprotective. She hopped up the stairs and sat down next to the curly-haired boy.

“Hey, bud,” she greeted, smiling and ruffling his hair.

“Hi, Lapis!” he grinned.

Bismuth came a few minutes later. Lapis automatically became nervous, for whatever reason, and Pearl greeted the stocky woman with a kiss on her cheek.

Peridot hobbled up to the loft and sat down next to Lapis, who was sitting at the edge, leaning against a wall.

“Why are you so nervous?” the blonde whispered.

“I’m not nervous,” Lapis grumbled, looking away, a rosy pink dusting her cheeks.

“Sure,” Peridot rolled her eyes.

Steven stabbed at the play button, and the TV flickered to life. He leaned on Pearl, who was sitting neatly next to Bismuth, eyes distracted. A weary Amethyst was shooting glares at the rainbow-haired woman from the corner of the TV. Lapis and Peridot stayed leaning on the wall, whispering comments to each other every few minutes, Peridot elbowing Lapis when she said something dirty, and Lapis coughing lightly whenever Peridot started ranting.

“Dogcopter is almost as gay as you,” Lapis snickered.

“He has a husband!” Peridot retorted.

“Yeah, but he doesn’t get flustered every time a male touches his shoulder or something.”

“That doesn’t mean anything,” the blonde scoffed.

The movie ended quicker than Peridot had expected it to. Maybe it was because the movie was better than she admitted it was. Or maybe it was because of all the stupid critique she had given it  _ with  _ Lapis.

“It’s almost twelve,” Amethyst grinned. “Just a minute left.”

“Switch it to the news channel!” Steven squeaked, reaching for the remote.

“All right,” Pearl murmured, picking it up.

The screen switched to showing an anticipating crowd of people at Empire City.

“ _ 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…” _

_ “ _ Happy New Year!” Amethyst hooted.

Everyone high-fived each other for no particular reason.

Couples kissed in the crowd. Peridot poked Lapis. “Too bad Jasper isn’t here, huh?” The sophomore had gone back to her parents after Christmas.

Lapis turned stone-faced. “Peridot, we’re kind of taking a break from each other.”

Peridot’s expression softened. “Oh. Sorry.” 

“It’s…fine.”

Peridot looked away quickly. Pearl was whispering something in Steven’s ear.

“ _ Are you sure _ ?” the curly-haired boy whispered back.

Pearl nodded solemnly. She stood up, in front of the TV, looking around the room. She paused at Lapis and Peridot, as if just realizing they were there. 

Pearl sighed.

“I have some news.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prepare for some a n g s t   
> also sorry if the ending, or the entire chapter in general, felt rushed


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl has some news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay this chapter is a mess  
> it's also really really short  
> i guess it's because everything was happening so fast??  
> i cant write angst im sorry everything is really rushed but i just dont know how to fix it  
> i also gave really shitty excuses for everything because i made steven wayyy older than he should've been for stuff to actually make sense which is great
> 
> also every time someone's in a heated argument and says "frick" or "freaking" or something like that pretend they're using more colorful words  
> i dont want my fingers to sin more than they already have

Silence coated the loft at Pearl’s reticent words.

Pearl glanced at Lapis and Peridot. “I, uh, forgot you two were going to be here. So you probably won’t understand this.”

Peridot blinked. Pearl kept her gaze on them.

Bismuth cleared her throat, prompting Pearl to go on.

The peach-haired woman swiveled her head around. Eerily, she didn’t yelp in surprise, as Peridot would’ve expected her to, after the way she had been acting for the past few days.

Pearl took a deep breath, looking again at everyone in the room.

“Rose Quartz…was Pink Diamond.”

The blonde and the blunette gasped at the same time. Peridot felt Lapis trembling slightly next to her.

_ Diamond? _

_ Pink? _

_ Pink Diamond? _

Peridot heard a clutter on the floor by the kitchen. Garnet’s shades had fell off her face, revealing a blue eye and a darker red eye.

Subconsciously, Peridot noted the tall woman’s heterochromia, which was probably related to the fact that she never took her sunglasses off. But the blonde was mostly focused on Pink Diamond.

Lapis was trying to get up next to Peridot.

“Wait!” the shorter girl whispered. Lapis was on the verge of tears. “I’m sure it’s a different Diamond…”

Pink Diamond. Her mother had mentioned a Pink Diamond. Her mother had mentioned Blue Diamond. Who the hell were these other Diamonds?

Peridot barely noticed Garnet’s rage.

“She lied to me!” Garnet cried. “She lied to all of us!”

“Garnet—” Pearl started.

Garnet rushed to her room. Peridot had never seen the cryptic woman like this ever before.

“I’ll go to her,” Amethyst said in a shaky voice. Steven followed the Latina, practically jumping off the loft.

“Who’s Pink Diamond?” Lapis yelled, her voice echoing. Bismuth got up, walking to the blunette.

“Bismuth, don’t—” Peridot started, but the stocky girl had already placed a hand on Lapis’ shoulder.

“ _ Don’t touch me _ ,” Lapis growled, a fierce, frightening fire in her eyes. Bismuth backed away, a look of terror on her face.

Lapis’ face immediately softened. A blush crept on her face. “Wait, no, I’m so sorry—”

“Pearl,” Peridot interrupts. “Is Pink Diamond related to Yellow Diamond?”

Pearl’s eyes widened. “Why—I—”

“How?” Peridot continued, a little louder than she expected.

Pearl took another deep breath. “Yellow adopted Pink.”

“What?”

“Yellow Diamond…and Blue Diamond. They took care of Pink.”

Lapis breath hitched. “Blue Diamond…had a freaking…child?” she yelled.

“Yes,” Pearl stated. “How do you two know of them?”

Peridot clenched her fists. “I’m Yellow Diamond’s freaking daughter! I’m Peridot Diamond!”

Pearl’s eyes seemed to widen even more. “Wh-what? And Lapis?” 

“Blue Diamond,” the blue-haired girl whispered, tears streaming down her face, “told my parents to do horrible things to me. She told them to lock me in the bathroom, she told them to—”

“Lapis,” Peridot said softly. “She’s not here.”

“My parents stopped contacting her,” Lapis continued, ignoring her roommate. “They, they f-figured out she used to have a girlfriend.” The blunette laughed. “If they knew I was bi, they probably would’ve disowned me if I d-didn’t already freaking leave them!”

Peridot swallowed. “How is this…related to you guys?” she said in a low voice.

“Rose…” Pearl breathed, “Rose was always against Homeworld Incorporated—I’m guessing you know what that is—she was always against who she was as Pink Diamond. She ran away, and somehow got the money for plastic surgery and…” Pearl looked up. “She told everyone about how Homeworld treated its workers. Pink Diamond had gone missing—Rose had even been accused of  _ murder _ ! And…I was the only one she told. Just some little girl that saw Rose, that supported Rose. Just a little nine-year-old…”

Peridot nodded, prompting Pearl to continue.

“Homeworld has affected all of us somehow. Amethyst’s family’s supports Homeworld—Jasper supports Homeworld—” 

Peridot heard a quiet sob from her roommate. “Go on.”

Pearl swallowed. “Homeworld also hated Garnet. They sent kids from supporting families—”

“To riot against people with gay parents,” Peridot finished quietly. “My mother stopped doing it. After she met Blu— _ her _ . It all makes sense now.”

Pearl nodded solemnly. “And I was just in it for Rose. She taught me to be my own person, though.” 

“How old was Rose when she conceived Steven?” the blonde asked abruptly. She had walked closer to the tall woman, as Bismuth was attempting to comfort Lapis.

“Sixteen,” Pearl murmured.

“Oh,” Peridot’s face fell. “Wait…shouldn’t you be seven? Fourteen years ago—”

“I’m twenty-three,” Pearl said. “I came to college two years late, for, er, reasons…”

“Oh. So Garnet’s younger than you, or did she also—”

“Garnet!” Pearl cried out, panic settled in her voice. The peach-haired woman rushed to Garnet’s room.

Peridot stood mostly in shock. She finally remembered her crumbling roommate and her other friend who was trying to help said roommate.

“Lapis!” Peridot exclaimed, turning around quickly. “Are you okay?”

“She was horrible to Pink, too,” Lapis answered, her voice hoarse. “I hate her. I hate all of them! I hate every single Diamond! Every single one!”

Peridot’s heart sank at those words.

* * *

Somehow, things got worse.

Confirming that Yellow Diamond, the mother of Peridot, the only person besides Steven who knew how to comfort Lapis, had loved  _ Blue Diamond _ , the blue-haired girl’s greatest enemy, had hurt her. She had no one to turn to.

Lapis would sulk around all day. She ignored Peridot and hung out with Jasper a lot more. Break was over, but Peridot was sure Lapis was skipping half her classes. She refused to eat anything, and wasn’t in the dorm room half the nights.

The blonde didn’t know what her roommate was doing, skipping classes and not sleeping in a bed.

Or at least, not in  _ her _ bed.

* * *

“Lapis!” Peridot stopped her roommate from leaving. “You have to eat something.”

“Why does it matter?” the blunette shoved Peridot away. “We’re all just tools for those rich snobs. They don’t care about anyone. Who even am I? Why do I matter?” She stormed out the door, leaving Peridot staring at her worriedly.

Peridot wished she wasn’t the daughter of the vice CEO of the stupid Homeworld Incorporated. She wished she was just a normal college student.

She knew Lapis blamed her.

* * *

Lapis was in the other bed.

Peridot took a deep breath. “Lapis…” she started.

The blunette turned slightly, still mostly facing away from her roommate.

“…I’m sorry.”

Peridot choked on her words, expecting no response. It was quiet for a few minutes, the only sound being the light drizzle outside.

“It isn’t your fault,” Lapis whispered. “I’m the one who should be sorry. I’ve been ignoring you.”

Peridot turned away, not saying anything.

“You just…remind me. You’re Yellow Diamond’s daughter. Blue Diamond and your mom dated or whatever.”

“I’m not her,” the blonde shot back hoarsely. “I’ll never be her. I never was her! I hate her as much as you do!”

The blue-haired girl peeked over her shoulder. “I’m…sorry…”

“I just want to help you.”

More silence glazed the room, becoming more and more agonizing.

“Can you…” Lapis blushed. “Would you mind, uh, sleeping here? N-next to me? Just, um, for tonight. Obviously.”

Peridot flushed. “Oh…I…” the blonde got up.

Lapis scooched over. Peridot had no idea how they both fit, but somehow they did.

“Sorry if this is uncomfortable,” Lapis mumbled.

“It’s fine. As long as you’re okay.”

Lapis muttered something under her breath. Peridot hoped she didn’t hear it right, because the blonde was pretty sure her roommate had said she  _ wasn’t  _ okay.

* * *

Peridot woke up groggily, not really remembering what had happened the night before.

So she was definitely surprised when she woke up with the blunette’s lean, sinewy arms around her waist, pressed against her— _getting_ _spooned by her_ —on the _wrong_ _bed_.

“Oh my stars!” Peridot jumped out of the bed, blushing and waking the blunette up.

“Huh?” Lapis said weakly, rubbing her eyes. “What…?”

“N-nothing!” Peridot stammered.

She rushed out the door to the bathroom, hearing Lapis groan a, “Whatever,” into her pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i told you it was going to be rushed hahahahahahaha  
> its mostly because i didnt plan the whole Lapis-ignoring-Peridot thing and ive already kind of planned the next chapter out so i needed them on mostly good terms and stuff  
> i swear i know whats going to happen i just keep redoing how the chapters are split up so it doesnt seem like i make something up at the beginning of the chapter thats plot-convenient later in the same chapter
> 
> also if it wasnt obvious lapis has a crush on bismuth  
> i tried to make it obvious but  
> she just  
> i dont ship it but i just feel like  
> idk i just added it in  
> its not going to get more obvious than that so i might as well say it now


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Letters arrive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slushies and depression
> 
> updating on my birthday :)))

When the letters had arrived, Lapis was absent from the dorm.

She said that she had gone to a swim meet. That was always her excuse. Lapis never came back looking like she had been in a pool. She hadn’t looked like that, now that Peridot thought about it, since Thanksgiving.

They boy from earlier, the one who had caught Peridot and Lapis painting, had handed the blonde the letters.

One was for her, and the other for her roommate. The envelopes looked identical. Peridot tossed Lapis’ on her bed, and focused on her own.

Its envelope was the color of gold, a rose seal covering the opening of its flap.

Peridot wasn’t sure who would’ve sent the letter to her. When she scanned the letter inside and looked at who had signed at the bottom, her jaw nearly hit the floor.

_ Sincerely, _

_ Yellow Diamond _

Peridot’s fingers stumbled over the other envelope, ripping it open as fast as she could. Her eyes immediately shot to the bottom of the page.

_ Sincerely, _

_ Blue Diamond _

* * *

When Lapis came back into the dormitory, Peridot rushed to her. The blunette’s eyes were unfocused, and she was clearly thinking about something.

“Are you okay?” the blonde asked, making sure Lapis wouldn’t get a trigger on top of another trigger.

“I—Peridot, where was Blue Diamond all those years?” Lapis questioned.

“Wh-what?”

“Where did she go? She wasn’t with Yellow Diamond, right?”

Peridot blinked. “I guess…I guess not.”

“How many more kids did she hurt?” Lapis scowled, storming towards her bed.

“Wait, uh, Lapis,” Peridot whispered.

“What?” the blue-haired girl snapped.

Peridot swallowed. “We got some letters.”

“I didn’t tell anyone I was here. There’s no way anyone contacted me—”

“Lapis, they’re from Yellow and Blue Diamond.”

Lapis froze. Her look turned icy.

“Give me the letter,” she demanded. Peridot handed the torn envelope to her roommate.

Lapis read over the letter quickly. The look of distress on her face faded away. “Did you read the letter?”

“Well, uh, no.”

“It’s just some stupid Valentine’s Day ball from Homeworld or something. There’s going to be a meeting, too, for the employees of Homeworld, but we don’t have to go—”

“A meeting?” Peridot squeaked. “That’s for me! Probably about the future of Homeworld!”

“Peri, you don’t have to go,” Lapis repeated flatly.

“You don’t understand,” Peridot answered frantically, running her fingers through her hair. “The Diamonds are rich, remember? I wasn’t kidding when I said they had bodyguards! Yellow’s going to come after both of us.”

“Why me?” Lapis deadpanned.

“Blue wants you to come for a reason! Normally, they sign with ‘The Diamond Authority’ or something like that. But not this time! She’s  _ personally  _ inviting you—”

“Wait,” Lapis interrupted. “That means…Yellow and Blue have been contacting each other. They’re both hosting this ball.”

“Along with White Diamond,” Peridot breathed.

Lapis raised an eyebrow. “Exactly  _ how _ many Diamonds are there?”

“We aren’t related,” Peridot retorted. “I have to get ready for that meeting, that’s the reason—”

“Oh,” Lapis read a line off the middle of the paper. “Jasper better get ready, too. It says it’s necessary for anyone not in the meeting to have a date.”

* * *

“How are you not worried?” Peridot asked while pacing around the room. It was the day after, and Lapis was still silent about the situation.

“I don’t have to see Blue Diamond, right? She’s probably going to be at the meeting,” Lapis replied.

Peridot shook her head. “I asked Pearl about both of them later on. Blue Diamond didn’t do much. She was the one who held all the parties, and mingled. That’s why she left Homeworld. Well, that and Pink, or Rose, leaving.”

Lapis scoffed. “Why would she hang out with me?”

“Lapis, your family’s going to be there too.”

The blunette’s expression hardened. “They would enjoy it,” she glowered through gritted teeth. “A rich party…more important than their own daughter’s health.”

“Hey…your twin sisters are going to be there, too, right? Maybe you can catch up with them!”

Lapis glared at the wall. “They’re no better. They constantly tease me about everything. They make me feel worthless.”

“…how old are they?”

“Does that really matter? When’s your birthday?”

“August, but how is that rela—”

“They’re older than you,” Lapis answered, slumping against her bed.

“What?” Peridot blinked. “But you said they were younger than  _ you _ ! That’s not physically possible—”

Lapis rolled her eyes. “They’re adopted. They’re technically my cousins. After my uncle died, my mom adopted them.”

“What are their names?”

Lapis snickered. “Freckles and Curly.”

“Wait, really?”

“No, dork. I just call them that.”

“Does that mean that they’re fraternal twins?”

“Yeah. The only thing they have in common appearance-wise is their blue hair. It’s a shade darker than mine.”

“They dyed it, too?”

“Last time I checked. Which was a few years ago…still.”

“Are they similar personality-wise?”

Lapis thought for a moment. “Freckles is less mean. She’s more open to other ideas. Curly always tries to get what she wants. It’s hard to explain, but I guess she’s more of a bitch.”

“Even more than you?” Peridot responded dryly, which resulted in Lapis throwing a pillow at the blonde’s face.

“Freckles does whatever Curly wants. She’s more of a follower. But I can beat them both in a fight,” Lapis continued.

“But you won’t.”

“Sure.”

Peridot narrowed her eyes at her smirking roommate.

Lapis’ smirk dropped. “But…I don’t  _ have _ to interact with them, right?”

“Blue Diamond’s probably going to talk to you,” Peridot answered sadly.

Lapis looked away. “How did they even figure out about us? You, maybe you accidentally told Yellow Diamond—”

“What?”

“—but you  _ probably _ didn’t tell them about me. Right?”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “It was probably someone else. Someone who supports Homeworld. Someone like…”

“Jasper!” Lapis yelped, her eyes widening. “She supports Homeworld!”

“I’m sure she didn’t know about the Blue Diamond thing. ‘Diamond’ might’ve set her off, though, it being my last name and all.”

Lapis slouched. “I, um, didn’t tell her. About my childhood.”

Peridot blinked. “Why did you tell me?”

Lapis hid most of her face with her hand, her elbow propped on her knee. “I dunno…she has a big mouth. You wouldn’t tell anyone. You haven’t told anyone, right?”

Peridot laughed. “Who would I tell?”

“Amethyst?”

Peridot faltered. “Why would I tell her?”

Lapis shrugged. “You two hang out. A  _ lot _ .”

Peridot muttered incoherent words under her breath. “Did you tell Steven?”

Lapis sighed. “Yeah. He’s good with this kind of stuff. Helping people….”

_ Like he helped Amethyst _ , Peridot thought. She shook her head, trying to clear the thought.  _ Maybe I  _ do  _ hang out with Amethyst too much. _

“It’s not her fault,” Lapis mumbled.

“Why would she mention you?” Peridot asked.

“I’m sure she had a reason.”

The blonde hopped off her bed. “I’m going to eat. Aren’t you hungry?”

Lapis shrugged, her lips pursed, her eyes quiet. “I’m fine.”

* * *

Peridot leaned on the wall of the Big Donut, waiting for Amethyst to come. While she waited, she thought about the letter.

It had been a few days since it had arrived. Lapis had gotten more and more weary, her anxiety showing.

“Do you take pills?” Peridot blurted out one day.

Lapis blinked. “What do you mean?”

“For, um, your PTSD. And insomnia.”

Lapis shrugged.

Peridot was convinced that Lapis needed some kind of help. The closer it got to the day of the ball, the more worried Lapis seemed to get. She would jump at little things, and was obviously constantly thinking about it.

Peridot hadn’t told her yet that it spanned over a few weeks. It was in the letters, but it was written so vaguely that only someone who had  _ gone _ to the ball would understand.

Peridot hadn’t gone to a ball for a long time since there hadn’t  _ been _ a ball for a long time. She remembered one from when she was eight. The ball was held every ten years, after all. The blonde was sure that this ball would be a lot more lively with Blue Diamond there, instead of the drab “party” she had to go to when she was younger.

Peridot sighed. She wanted to say all of this to someone else. She couldn’t worry Lapis. She wasn’t sure Steven would understand. That left Amethyst.

“P-dot!” a voice called, snapping Peridot out of her daze. Amethyst was in front of her, grinning, her hand on Peridot’s shoulder.

“Hey, Amethyst,” Peridot responded, giving her a weak smile.

Amethyst frowned. “You okay?”

Peridot shrugged. “I have a lot on my mind. Care to listen?”

Amethyst’s eyes glazed with concern. “What happened?”

Peridot sighed again. “Let’s sit down somewhere.”

The blonde led Amethyst to a cluster of tables in front of the donut store. She sank into the chair, sighing for a third time.

“So, what’s up?” Amethyst said.

Peridot looked away. How much did she want to tell Amethyst? The green-eyed girl knew Lapis wouldn’t tell anyone else. She wasn’t close with  _ anyone _ . Even Jasper…the blunette wouldn’t tell her, either.

But what about Amethyst? Loud, lively Amethyst?

Hesitantly, Peridot started. “So, we’ve been invited to a ball.”

“Okay…?”

“From Homeworld.”

Amethyst blinked. “Wait…what?”

“Amethyst, Yellow Diamond is my mom,” Peridot continued hoarsely. “Lapis has…bad history with Homeworld. She’s been invited too. I don’t want her to get trigge—”

“Why are you going?”

“I have to go! I don’t have a choice! Yellow Diamond  _ knows  _ people, Amethyst. She has guards. We— _ I  _ think that Jasper somehow helped them!”

“What? Why would  _ Jasper _ help Homeworld?” Amethyst narrowed her eyes, getting defensive.

“She supports Homeworld! It might’ve been unintentional, but—”

“Don’t blame Jasper, then!” Amethyst shot back. “If she did it unintentionally!”

“That’s not the point! I’m  _ worried _ , Amethyst! What’s going to happen there? Lapis’ PTSD, and—”

Amethyst’s eye twitched at Lapis’ name. “Why do you  _ always _ think about La—”

“ _ Do you want her to have a breakdown _ ?” Peridot answered, standing up and throwing her arms in the air.

Amethyst sulked back into her seat.

“I’m worried, too,” Peridot breathed. “I have to go to a meeting! Yellow Diamond might take me out of BCU—I’m surprised she hasn’t done it yet! She knows where I am!”

“Peridot, calm down,” Amethyst said in a shaky voice. “ _ Sit _ down.”

Peridot breathed heavily, anger still visible on her face, but obliged and sat down.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Amethyst comforted. “You really need to stop worrying so much. Maybe you can even talk to your mom about what  _ you _ want to do with your life.”

Peridot knew that if she tried, things wouldn’t work out in her favor. But Amethyst’s words were soothing. She relished in them, imagining her mother standing proud, because of  _ her _ .

Peridot smiled. It was small, and barely there, but it filled her up with happiness. She gazed at Amethyst.

“Thanks,” Peridot said.

“For what?”

“That…helped.”

Amethyst smiled back.

* * *

Peridot sat on her bed, fingers hovering over her keyboard, eyes staring into her computer screen. She yelped when thunder boomed outside, but quickly regained her focus.

The blonde heard the door open loudly, slamming into the opposite wall. Peridot tore her eyes away from her computer.

Lapis was in the doorway, dripping wet. Shadows hid the expression on her face, but Peridot could tell it wasn’t a good expression. The room seemed to get colder, and it wasn’t because the door was open. Peridot suppressed the urge to shiver. A bad feeling settled at the bottom of her stomach.

Lapis whispered something hoarsely.

“Wh-what?” Peridot asked, not able to hear. Worry loomed into her.

Their eyes locked.

“We broke up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know the whole "you need to have a date" thing is forced and doesnt make sense, but its important okay


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you've read the tags, i guess you can kind of tell where this is going to go since they broke up  
> ":)

Peridot rushed towards Lapis, who had started falling. The blonde caught her disheveled roommate in her pale arms.

“Lapis!” she cried. “What happened? Are you alright?”

Lapis looked up at Peridot, a dark expression on her face. “I _said_ we broke up.”

“How? When? Why?” Peridot asked, gently pulling Lapis towards her bed.

Pumpkin crawled backwards, whimpering in the corner.

“It’s none of your business,” the blunette muttered, collapsing. She hugged her pillow tightly. Peridot kneeled down to face her. She could see dry tear stains on Lapis’ cheeks, her dark hair messier than usual. Her navy blue eyes were empty, giving away nothing.

“I’m just trying to help,” Peridot responded, running her fingers through Lapis’ hair to calm her. The coaxing made Lapis’ face soften, before her prior expression took over again. Angry. Resisting. Empty.

“You don’t need to. You don’t want to know what happened. Why it happened,” she answered, turning around to face the wall.

Peridot staggered back. “What the hell, Lapis?” she yelled. “You come into our room like this and you don’t expect me to ask?”

“I don’t want to talk about it!” Lapis snapped.

Peridot curled her hands into fists. “Fine! Be that way! I thought you trusted me!” The blonde stormed to her bed.

The green-eyed freshman heard a sniff from the other side of the dorm.

“I can’t tell you everything, Peridot. I don’t want you to…never mind.”

Peridot curled up tighter.

What did Lapis mean?

* * *

Somehow, Peridot woke up first.

Lapis was still asleep, snoring softly. The blonde creeped over to catch a glimpse of her face. It was unnaturally tense, worrying Peridot. Her roommate had always _slept_ peacefully, if nothing else.

The green-eyed girl sighed. She stood up, glancing at a still-sleeping Pumpkin. Peridot fumbled with her glasses, sighing again, louder this time.

“…Peridot…?” Lapis murmured. Her eyes fluttered open. “…what happened?”

The blonde blinked angrily. “You tell _me_ what happened, Lapis!”

Lapis shuffled up. “So it did… _I_ did…”

“You did what?”

Lapis’ eyes widened in fear. She averted her eyes towards the door.

“Lapis, what happened? What are you not telling me?” Peridot shook Lapis’ shoulder. “I’m worried about you!”

“Peridot…” Lapis whispered. “You shouldn’t be near me.”

“I live with you!” Peridot answered, frustrated. _What isn’t she telling me?_

“I can’t live here anymore,” Lapis responded quietly. She picked herself up, and started gathering her things.

“Lapis, stop! Just tell me what happened!”

Lapis froze. Peridot stepped back, nearly bumping into her bed.

 _Did_ I _just trigger her?_

“Peridot, I don’t want you to get hurt!” Lapis snapped, her temper getting the better of her. She whirled around. “I’m a bad person!”

“You’re not a bad person, Lapis!” Peridot cried.

“You don’t know everything about me!” Lapis yelled.

“What happened? Please, I just want to help you!”

“I don’t need your help! I don’t deserve your help!”

“Lapis, please,” Peridot was on the verge of tears. “What happened between you and Jasper?”

Lapis dropped everything she was holding, sniffing. She slumped against the side of her bed, staring off in front of her. “If I told you…you would be scared of me.”

Peridot crouched down next to her roommate. She gently placed her hand on Lapis’ shoulder. “If you want to…I won’t be scared. You seem like you need to talk to someone.”

Lapis nodded slowly, gulping back the tears that had started forming on her eyes. “I…I wanted to d-do it for a while. Break up with her.”

“Jasp—”

“Don’t say her name.”

Peridot nodded, slipping down in a more comfortable position, hand still on the blunette’s shoulder.

“I told her to come by the Temple,” Lapis continued. “Near the ocean. It calmed me. It _used_ to calm me….” Her hands started shaking, her breath getting faster.

“Lapis—Lapis, stay with me,” Peridot turned to face her. “Why does it not…?”

Lapis laughed humorlessly. Her eye twitched. “She made me quit the swim team,” she replied simply.

“But you love swimming!”

Lapis’ gaze drifted downward. She took a deep breath. “Anyway, I told her we were over. She was too possessive. She said that it was ‘out of the blue’ and got mad. _Really_ mad.”

“Lapis…what kind of relationship did you have with her? Were you two…” 

Lapis growled, “I—I felt trapped! I only stayed with her because I hated her! I loved taking my anger out on her!”

Peridot’s eyes widened. “…what?”

Lapis fought back a sob. “I miss her, Peri. I miss hating her. I miss _hurting_ her.”

Peridot attempted to take a step back, before realizing she was sitting down. Who was _this_ Lapis? She wasn’t funny, sarcastic, and sweet. She wasn’t the same Lapis that was her roommate. “You _miss_ her?”

“She wasn’t a bad person! She was just…possessive!” Lapis cried. “She…she never loved me, Peridot. Homeworld _told_ her to…and she stayed for the sex! I hate her!”

“ _Homeworld_ told her to?” The blonde blinked at the revelation.

“Our relationship was a joke! And I tried…then I—”

“Then you what?”

“I tried to drown her!” Lapis shouted. “She pulled me towards the ocean. Being in water makes me feel comfortable—I thought I was _safe_ ! A little _too_ safe! I—her eyes, she was so s-scared, and it was because of _me_!”

Peridot shifted closer. “Lapis, Lapis look at me,” she whispered, looking straight at her. The blue-haired girl refused to return the gesture.

Peridot tilted Lapis’ chin up, green eyes locked with blue. “Listen, I—you aren’t a bad person. Sometimes good people do bad things. That’s all,” she said, saying it to herself as much as she was saying it to Lapis. The blonde’s hands shook in fear.

_Lapis wouldn’t hurt me, right? She’s my friend. She cares about me. Right?_

Peridot took a deep breath. “It’s okay. You two aren’t together now. You don’t have to meet her ever again.”

Lapis looked away. “She’s Bismuth’s friend, Peridot…”

Peridot ran her hand through her hair. “I—if you don’t want to see her, don’t. Just don’t talk with Bismuth when Jasper’s there! Don’t get near Jasper! She’s just a clod!”

“This isn’t Jasper’s fault! You’re obviously biased because you’re my friend!”

“I’m Jasper’s friend, too!”

“You’ve talked to her, what, three times since the beginning of the school year? And I was there every single time!”

“I knew Jasper before, Lapis!”

“She’s changed!”

“For the worse!”

Lapis looked away again. “I just wish…I could’ve _killed_ her, Peridot.”

“You didn’t, right? You stopped before anything could happen.”

Lapis sighed. “The damage has been done. We’ve hurt each other too much. _I’ve_ hurt her too much.”

Peridot wrapped her arms around Lapis, holding her. “It’ll be fine,” she murmured.

She wasn’t sure how true that was.

* * *

“Peridot!” Amethyst said through the phone. Peridot stuck her hand out about a foot away from her ear.

“Can you _quiet down_?” Peridot muttered. She struggled to hold her textbook with the other hand. “And hurry up. I have Engineering in a few minutes.”

“I got a letter! From Homeworld!”

Peridot’s eyes widened. “What?” she exclaimed.

“Yeah, I think it’s the same one you got—”

“Does that mean Jasper got one?”

The line was quiet for a moment. “Uh, Jasper’s gone. We don’t know where she is. She didn’t get the letter.”

Peridot stood in silence for a moment, until a boy bumped into her. He was wearing a scarf (even though they were _inside_ ) and a permanent sneer.

“Watch where you’re going, you clod!” the blonde snapped. She whisked away, heading to Engineering. “Amethyst, I need to go. As long as Jasper’s not going, it’s—”

“It wasn’t _just_ Jasper’s fault, you know,” Amethyst shot back. “Lapis should take some blame.”

Peridot sighed. “Lapis _is_ taking the blame! She—argh, I can’t talk to you right now! You’ll be at the Temple, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll talk after. Have the letter ready,” Peridot finished. She fumbled with her phone, grumbling under her breath.

Peridot headed straight for the Temple after Engineering. She dumped her books on the kitchen counter, scaring the life out of Pearl. Then, she rushed to where Amethyst was.

“Show me the letter,” the green-eyed girl demanded.

Amethyst pulled out a torn envelope lazily.

Peridot grabbed at it, pulling out the actual letter and scanning it quickly while stumbling on to a chair. She froze towards the end of the letter.

“That doesn’t make sense,” she mumbled. “We have the ball for four weeks, while you only have it for two.”

“You guys got direct letters, right? Mine’s from the entire Authority, not a specific Diamond,” replied Amethyst.

Peridot peered at the end of the letter. She was right. “I suppose you don’t have to come to the meeting, either. But why did Lapis…?”

“Ask her.”

Peridot’s eyes darted up. “I, er, didn’t tell her. That it’s for several weeks.”

Amethyst blinked slowly. “What? You gotta tell her, P-dot.”

Peridot sighed. “I will. Eventually. Anyway, who’s your date?”

“I don’t need a date.”

“What?”

“I’m going to go to the meetings. One of them, anyway. I guess you have more meetings than me,” Amethyst shrugged.

Peridot groaned in frustration. “This doesn’t make any sense! Why would you need to go to a meeting, anyway?”

“My family’s part of Homeworld, remember?” Amethyst grumbled. “My cousins don’t really agree with it, though.”

“Wait, you don’t _need_ to go, right?”

“Nah. But the Famethyst want me to come. Don’t want them getting lonely.”

“ _Famethyst_?”

“My cousins,” Amethyst snickered. “It’s an inside joke.”

Peridot raised an eyebrow. “Anyway…you’re only going for them?”

“Yeah. I probably don’t even need to go to the actual meeting. They’re kinda these big-shots or whatever, so they need to go. Or maybe they said big _shorts_ …”

Peridot fell back against her chair. “Ugh. None of this makes any _sense_.”

“Already said that, Peri.”

“Am I wrong?”

* * *

“Hey, Lazuli?” Peridot mumbled, walking nervously up to her roommate, Pumpkin at her heels.

Lapis, on her bed and scrolling through her phone, didn’t look up and responded with, “Hm?”

“I have…um, something to tell you.”

“What is it?” answered Lapis, her voice flat.

 _She’s so calm right now_ , Peridot thought. _What if I trigger her?_ Again _? Me saying Jasper’s name triggered her, right?_

“About the ball…”

Lapis looked up. “Yeah?” she said, her voice a little more cautious.

_I don’t want to trigger her._

“Uh…it lasts…who’s your date?” Peridot stammered.

Lapis blinked. “Oh my stars, you’re right.”

 _That was probably a trigger, too! You’re such a clod!_ the blonde thought to herself.

“You can ask Bismuth,” Peridot answered nervously.

Lapis’ ears turned red. She turned her face away to hide her blush. “B-bismuth has Pearl!” she spluttered.

“You don’t actually have to ask her out. Just pretend.”

“Pearl will get jealous!” Lapis shot back, pulling her knees in and tucking her face on top. Peridot could still see a strong blush raging on her face.

Peridot rolled her eyes. “Okay, what about Amethyst?”

“No. Not Amethyst,” Lapis shuddered. “I can’t imagine that. Ever.”

Peridot laughed. “You don’t _actually_ have to—”

“It has to be _somewhat_ believable,” Lapis replied simply.

“Hmm, I dunno, you two would make a pretty badass couple.”

“Oh, shut up.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Don’t you have geography in a few minutes?”

Lapis’ head snapped up. “Oh shit—”

Peridot laughed again, helping the blunette grab her textbooks.

As Lapis closed the door, Peridot crouched down to pet Pumpkin, murmuring, “What would she do without me?”

* * *

Peridot was sure that this was the third time Lapis had kicked open the door.

The first time was when she brought Pumpkin to their small dorm. The second time was when she broke up with Jasper. So far, the blonde didn’t have enough information to figure out what her roommate’s intentions were. Did she somehow find _another_ animal? Did she have a depressive attack when she was in the lecture hall?

Peridot was surprised to find Lapis with a nervous look on her face.

“Hey, Peri,” Lapis grinned nervously.

 _What a change of character_ , Peridot scoffed internally.

“Look, I thought about what you said, and…” Lapis took a deep breath. “Will you be my date for the ball?”

Peridot’s eyes widened. She jumped back into the wall. “Wh-wh-what?” she yelped.

“You won’t—we won’t—we aren’t dating! I’m not asking you out! It’s just—we’re pretending! ” Lapis answered quickly and defensively.

Peridot blinked multiple times, her face getting warm. Both roommates had matching blushes on their cheeks. “I-I—you— _why me_?”

“Because I know you would say yes,” Lapis answered simply, sitting down roughly next to Peridot on her bed.

“You flirt with everyone you meet!” Peridot grumbled. “You couldn’t just push someone to a wall and ask them out?”

Lapis crossed her arms. “It— _shut up_! That’s a yes, right?”

“Fine!” growled Peridot. “But this doesn’t mean anything!”

A cocky smirk crossed Lapis’ lips, in spite of her blush. “Oh? You sure about that, Diamond?”

“Lazuli!” Peridot groaned. “Shut up!”

“Whatever. It’s just for, like, a weekend, right?”

Peridot’s eyes widened. “Heh. _About_ that.”

Lapis narrowed her eyes. “It’s for _two_ weekends?”

“More like four,” Peridot answered nervously.

Lapis blinked. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, don’t start catching feelings for me in all that time.”

Peridot threw a pillow at a laughing Lapis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the lapithyst duo was robbed  
> amethyst poses so lapis can spray-paint  
> make it canon rebecca


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amethyst exists.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yamethyst and fifty ways to write blush

“Should we go through this one more time?” Peridot asked.

Lapis groaned. “I really don't want to…but we probably should.”

Peridot smiled. “Okay, so it’s a big ballroom,” she pointed at the drawing she had scribbled on to a scrap of paper. “We go there after my meeting is over. The Diamonds are going to be in the very front…White Diamond probably won’t even show up.”

“I’m having a hard time keeping up with all these Diamonds,” Lapis said, a flirtatious hint in her voice as she twirled her hair. “Maybe instead we could—”

“Lapis!” Peridot grumbled, blushing.

“What?” she gave her roommate an innocent smile.

“I know I said our ‘relationship’ needed to look authentic, but—”

“I need to practice flirting with you.”

Peridot’s blush darkened. “No, you don’t.”

Peridot heard two quick knocks at their door. “Lapis!” a voice called from outside.

Lapis’ eyes widened. “Shit,” she mumbled, getting up fast. “She just had to come now.”

The blunette opened the door to a grinning Amethyst. “You have them with you, right?”

“Could you come back later?” Lapis responded through gritted teeth.

Amethyst raised an eyebrow. She glanced at Peridot, her smile getting wider. “ _ Oh _ ,” she snickered. “You don’t want Peri to know about your secret manga collection,  _ do you _ ?”

Peridot blinked.

Lapis grumbled, “That’s not—”

“That’s right, P-dot,” Amethyst smiled, looking straight at Lapis. “Your roommate is as nerdy as you.”

“That’s—argh! That’s not true!” Lapis scowled. A blush was raging on her face.

“ _ Right _ ,” Amethyst rolled her eyes. “Can you just hand it over?”

Lapis muttered a colorful sentence under her breath as she pulled out a stack of manga books.

“You’re giving them away?” Peridot asked, confused. “Why?”

Lapis froze. “Uh…I don't know. I don’t need them anymore.”

Peridot frowned. “If you say so.”

“What’s that?” said Amethyst, pointing at the paper Peridot had in front of her.

“I’m explaining the ball to Lazuli,” Peridot answered, drawing another ball-goer on to the paper.

Amethyst took the mangas from Lapis’ hands. A somber expression was set on Lapis’ face. Amethyst didn’t take notice of it, instead nervously asking, “Who are you taking? Since…well, you know.”

“Peridot,” Lapis answered flatly.

Amethyst’s eyes widened. “Wait,  _ what _ ?”

“We’re not actually dating!” Peridot said quickly. “It’s not—it’s not real, okay?”

Amethyst’s expression turned to stone. “Okay,” she muttered. “Well, I’m going to go now. See you guys later.” The Latina turned around and shut the door loudly behind her.

“What’s gotten into  _ her _ ?” Peridot mumbled.

Lapis shrugged, but she had a knowing look on her face.

* * *

Peridot woke up to a bombard of texts (what was this, the third, fourth, fifth time?). She groped for her phone, blurry-eyed and tired.

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ peri peri periiiii _

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ since its warm out _

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ pearl wants me to go to this restaurant with her!!! _

Peridot smirked.

**_Peridot:_ ** _ i thought you didnt like her _

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ hfkjshfkj shut up _

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ do u want to come or not _

**_Peridot:_ ** _ i wouldnt want to interrupt anything ;) _

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ SDJFHKJSHF PERIDOT _

Peridot spent the next few minutes laughing, waiting for a better reply and successfully waking up Lapis.

“Why are you laughing like a freaking hyena at—” Lapis checked her phone. “Nine-thirty? It’s already nine-thirty?”

“Yes,” Peridot answered, still snickering.

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ just bring lapis, okay? _

**_Amethyst:_ ** _ double date _

Peridot’s eyes widened. She tried to hide the blush spread on her freckled face, but Lapis had already spotted it.

“What?” Lapis snorted, “Did Amethyst send you an inappropriate joke? Or n—”

“No!” Peridot yelped, tossing her pillow at the blunette. A soft laugh rang through the room. “She’s going on a…date? That’s what she’s calling it. With Pearl. And she invited me.”

“…okay?”

“And you. On, um, a double date.”

Lapis flashed Peridot a grin, despite the fact that her face was flushing. “I see.”

**_Peridot:_ ** _ we’re coming _

“I’m getting ready,” Peridot mumbled, crawling out of her bed. She ignored the lewd joke Lapis made as the blonde shut the door to their dorm, and strolled to the bathroom.

An hour later, both roommates were ready: Peridot adorned in a green-shirt and black leggings, and Lapis wearing a crop-top and jeans even though it was still fairly cold. She pulled on a new pair of Converse.

“You got  _ shoes _ ?” Peridot questioned, narrowing her eyes at the white sneakers.

“I figured I should wear them,” Lapis answered, shrugging.

“ _ Sure _ ,” Peridot muttered, rolling her eyes. “You’re wearing a jacket over that, right?”

“ _ Fine _ ,” groaned Lapis. She grasped her jacket and pulled it on. Peridot pulled on a sweatshirt, snickering. “Where is this place, anyway?”

“I dunno,” Peridot replied, checking her texts. “I have the address, though. Do you have a car?”

“No,” Lapis said, standing up.

“Guess we’re walking.”

The blunette grinned, grabbing Peridot’s hand and pulling her out the door.

* * *

“You know, while we’re walking,” Peridot suggested, “we should review some stuff. About the ball.

“No thanks,” Lapis mumbled. “We’re almost at the place, anyway. It’s around that corner.” She pulled one of her hands out of her pocket and pointed at the turn.

“We should hurry,” Peridot said, speeding up. Lapis simply took longer strides, not needing to speed up.

The two of them pushed open the doors at the same time, and were greeted by Amethyst waving at them from a corner.

“Hey guys!” she hollered.

“Shush!” Pearl hissed as Lapis and Peridot got closer. She gently pushed Amethyst’s arm down.

Lapis giggled, sliding into the seat next to Amethyst. Peridot sat next to her, across from Pearl.

“This place looks familiar,” Peridot muttered, looking around.

Lapis squinted her eyes at someone by the corner, frowning. “Wait a second—is that—”

Amethyst followed her gaze. When it reached the singled-out person, she started laughing. “Oh, shit! That’s your boyfriend, isn’t it?”

Lapis rolled her eyes. “He’s  _ not _ my boyfriend,” she sighed. “Ugh, why is that jerk here?”

“To eat?” Peridot answered, confused. “What’s going on?”

“Oh, good, he’s leaving,” Lapis muttered, eyes following him. “He’s this idiot I met at prom during senior year. I had a whole breakdown because of him.”

“Oh my stars, prom was such a  _ mess _ ,” Amethyst snickered. “You hated your dress, you hated the people—”

“I didn’t hate my dress,” Lapis interrupted. “It wasn’t that bad. Everyone just said it was too simple.”

“What was it?” Peridot asked, glancing at her roommate.

“I have a picture,” Lapis mumbled, pulling out her phone. “It’s probably in here somewhere, just wait a minute—”

“And for some reason, a bunch of juniors crashed the party,” Amethyst continued. “Pearl and Bismuth included. Lapis was so embarrassed—”

“Shut up!” Lapis snorted, flicking Amethyst’s outstretched hand. “ _ You _ were trying to—”

Amethyst leaned over the table to cover Lapis’ mouth. “Shhh!”

Lapis pulled Amethyst’s hand away from her, and showed her phone to Peridot. “It was this. Just a blue crop top and a blue skirt.”

“So you were  _ always _ obsessed with blue?” Peridot questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Lapis smirked. “Yeah.”

“Oh, your hair is a lighter shade of blue.”

“And brighter,” Pearl muttered.

“ _ Anyway _ ,” Amethyst said. “Lapis met this guy named Kevin—”

“He was a huge jerk that was wearing a scarf  _ indoors _ ,” Lapis chimed in.

“Oh,” Peridot blinked. “I think I bumped into him once. He looked pretty weird.”

“If you think he’s weird,” Pearl noted. “You haven’t met Ronaldo.”

“ _ Ronaldo _ !” Amethyst shuddered. “That dude was—I don't even want to talk about him.”

“Oh, this seems interesting,” Lapis said, leaning on her elbow, her eyes half-lidded.

“He wanted to move in with Steven,” Pearl explained. “We kicked him out, though. The intentions will never be told.”

“If you say so,” Peridot sighed. “Hey, when’s the food coming?”

“Shit,” Amethyst’s eyes widened. “We didn’t order anything.”

* * *

Peridot sighed happily. 

“Why was that more fun than hanging out with you?” Lapis said.

Peridot elbowed the laughing blunette. “All I heard from that was that you enjoy hanging out with me.”

“I never said that, did I?”

“But you implied it.”

“I really didn’t.”

“Shut up, Lazuli.”

* * *

“How many days until the ball?” Lapis asked, kicking her feet into the air while scrolling through her phone.

“Uh, two,” Peridot answered anxiously.

“Will we have to…dress up?”

Peridot scoffed, “Of course we will! What kind of question is that?”

Lpais groaned. “I don’t have to wear a dress, right?”

“You can wear a suit,” Peridot shrugged.

“What are you going to wear?” Lapis asked, raising an eyebrow, a smirk on her lips.

A rosy pink dusted on Peridot’s cheeks. “I—er, a d-dress,” she stuttered.

“Can I see it?” Lapis responded flatly.

“No,” Peridot mumbled, crossing her arms.

“I’ll see it soon enough,” Lapis teased in a sing-song voice.

Peridot huffed, smiling in spite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the short chapter  
> but this story is more than a hundred pages long now


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot and Lapis attend the first day of the ball.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've written "blush" in different ways so many times that it's gotten annoying,, anyway here's the actual plot starting, watch me mess up lapis' feelings towards bd and her family

Peridot fumbled with the straps of her canary dress. She yanked her crocs on next, the ones she had never worn in her life prior to the ball, and they miraculously fit. Straightening herself, she walked out the bathroom.

Lapis, who had been leaning on the wall outside the door, clothes in her arms, gave Peridot a quick once-over, her eyes slipping to the blonde’s hips.

“Lapis!” Peridot cried, face reddening.

“Sorry,” Lapis said with a lopsided grin. “You’re just so _cute_!”

Peridot’s cheeks darkened. “I—you—you’re such an insufferable clod!”

“I know you love me!” Lapis exclaimed as Peridot pushed past her, somehow blushing even more. The blonde heard the bathroom door shut behind her, a content humming coming from the other side of it.

A few endless minutes later, Lapis strolled into their shared dorm, wearing a dark blue suit and dark blue pants, hair brushed as much as it could be, signature smirk on her face.

“How do I look?” Lapis beamed.

Peridot tried to look in the other direction, but she found herself looking at her roommate again and again. It felt like someone was doing backflips in her stomach. “I—um, you look good,” she answered, finally ripping her sight away. The backflips didn’t cease.

Lapis rolled her eyes, grabbing the shoes she had left by her bed.

“We should probably hurry up,” Peridot grumbled, halfway through the door.

“This would’ve gone _way_ faster if you didn’t insist that we both change in the bathroom,” Lapis retorted.

“What if I walked in on you?”

“I would’ve locked the door, you dumbass! And what if you did? Have you _really_ never changed in front of someone?”

Peridot was sure that if any more heat was brought to her face, she would combust. “N-no! I have some dignity!”

A look of disbelief crossed Lapis’ face. “That’s not—whatever, let’s just go.” She pulled herself up, following Peridot out the door.

Peridot skidded down the hallways, whispering, “Any last questions?”

“Don’t you have to go to that meeting thing first?” the blue-haired girl whispered back.

“No, not on the first day of each weekend. Just the second day.”

Lapis froze. “Um…I won’t have to, like, do any _romantic_ stuff with you, right?”

Peridot swallowed hard. “I…well, I wouldn’t really f-feel comfortable,” Peridot stuttered. “Doing, romantic stuff with, uh, _anyone_ , except maybe close friends…”

“Are you saying we’re not close?” Lapis said, taking a step back, a hurt look in her eyes.

“Wh-what? N-no! I just…” Peridot looked away. _I’m saying all the wrong things today_ , she thought.

Lapis crossed her arms, looking away from the blonde. “How are we supposed to get there, anyway?”

“Garnet’s dropping us off.”

“It’s in Empire City, right? So we’re staying the night?”

“Er, yes.”

Lapis sighed. “There’s Garnet.”

Peridot clambered into the back seat of the car first, followed by a swift Lapis. The blonde kept glancing at her roommate, fidgeting and tapping her foot restlessly.

“Stop looking at me!” Lapis snapped, her voice low.

“Sorry! It’s just…aren’t you nervous?” Peridot answered, looking straight into the blunette’s eyes.

Lapis slumped in her seat, sighing. “Yeah, I am. I guess…I’m trying to ignore it. I have to see by snobby parents again, the ones who, who—”

“Are you two okay?” Garnet asked from the front of the vehicle, her voice crisp and clear.

“We’re fine,” Peridot muttered. 

“All right,” Garnet shrugged, looking back at the road while starting the engine.

Peridot focused her attention back at her roommate. “Hey, it’ll be okay,” she said, resting her hand on top of Lapis’.

“I’m hoping so,” Lapis mumbled, her gaze distant.

“I’ll get to meet your sisters. Cousins. Them,” Peridot grinned.

Lapis shuddered. “I don’t think you want to,” she snorted.

Peridot leaned back on to the seat. “They can’t be any worse than you,” she teased.

“Hey!” Lapis smiled, pushing Peridot playfully.

“What are they going to think of me?” Peridot asked.

“Hmm, I don’t know, they might flirt with you,” Lapis responded, leaning towards her roommate.

“As if you don’t do that enough already,” Peridot scoffed.

“Don’t pretend you don’t enjoy it,” Lapis replied, a shit-eating grin on her face, eyes half-lidded, nose only centimeters away from Peridot’s.

“L-Lapis!” Peridot blushed, pulling back.

Garnet suddenly turned on a sharp corner. Peridot, who had conveniently forgotten to wear a seat belt, crashed on top of Lapis.

“Oh, I always thought it would be the other way around,” Lapis smirked. “Also, you should wear your seat belt.”

Peridot’s face felt like it was on fire. She grumbled incoherent worlds under her breath as she clicked her belt on. “If it’s going to be like this next time, I’m starting to regret saying yes…”

The statement swept the smile off of Lapis’ face. She turned away slowly, resting her elbow on the window frame, gazing outside.

Peridot’s face softened. “Hey, I didn’t really mean that. I don’t regret—”

“It’s not that,” Lapis murmured. “I’m fine.”

Peridot pressed against her seat harshly. _I’m such a clod._

“Really, it’s not your fault,” Lapis said softly, reading Peridot’s mind as she offered a small smile.

“Then what is it?” Peridot breathed, looking straight at Lapis. Something fluttered in her stomach.

Lapis pursed her lips. “It’s nothing,” she responded.

“Are you two okay?” Garnet hollered from the front. “You stopped arguing.”

“We’re fine!” Peridot retorted.

Out of nowhere, Garnet stopped. “I want to hear it from Lapis.”

“Garnet, what the hell? We’re in the middle of the ro—”

“I’m fine,” Lapis interrupted, her voice shaky.

Garnet dropped her shades slightly, her eyes narrowed. “If you say so.”

* * *

“Wake up!” a voice hissed in Peridot’s ear. The blonde felt something prod at her jaw. Her eyes fluttered open.

Suddenly, Peridot was jolted up.Her eyes opened faster, and she saw a pissed-off Lapis looking straight at her. “Finally, you’re awake!” she exclaimed.

“What happened?” Peridot asked as the blue-eyed girl handed her a water bottle.

“We’re here. At the ball. You fell asleep on my shoulder.”

“I—oh,” Peridot blinked, a blush arousing on her face.

Lapis crawled out of the car and extended an arm. Peridot took it, her short fingers intertwining with Lapis’ nimble ones.

“You two have fun,” Garnet waved, winking. At least, it looked like she winked. Nevertheless, heat pooled at Peridot’s cheeks.

“Come on,” Lapis said, gently tugging Peridot’s arm. “Let’s go inside. It’s cold out here.” She started moving towards the giant building in front of them.

Peridot reciprocated, taking in said building. In the lowly evening light, it looked like a pale golden, soft light strung around the edge of the roof. “Wow,” she breathed, pausing for a bit.

Lapis stopped next to her. “Are you going to hold my hand the whole way there?”

Peridot’s eyes widened, and she quickly pulled away. “Curse you, Lazuli.”

“It wasn’t _me_ holding the other’s hand.”

“I—that doesn’t make sense!”

Lapis shrugged, a smirk playing at her lips.

Peridot huffed, crossing her arms. Lapis continued towards the building, the shorter girl scurrying behind her quickly.

“So, is this going to be some kind of disco party?” Lapis murmured, pulling out their invitations from her pocket.

“Oh yes, a disco ball,” Peridot responded in dismay, rolling her eyes.

“I’m just saying,” the blunette grinned.

Two tall women stood in front of the large gates. They both had light, dyed hair and prominent lips, reminding Peridot of her loud friend who had been invited to the second and third week’s worth of balls.

Each woman took an invitation, analyzing it quickly. After their examination, the one on the right looked at Peridot and called out. “Hey, do you know Amethyst?”

Peridot blinked. “Er, yes.”

The one on the left smiled. “We’re her older cousins.”

“Okay,” Peridot laughed nervously. “Um, can we go inside now?”

A look of confusion passed both their faces, before they realized what the blonde had said. “Oh, of course!” they both said at the same time, pushing the gates open.

“You really have some people skills, hm?” Lapis whispered, a cocky smile on her face.

“Shut up, Lazuli,” Peridot answered, poking the blue-haired girl’s chest with her elbow.

Upon entry, Peridot saw a vast number of chairs and tables scattered around the back of the ballroom, the side closest to the gates. At the very front, there was a large, empty space, which Peridot assumed was for the…dancing. Oh, stars, she would have to dance.

Lapis’ eyes quickly darted to the sides, where there were tables of food present.

“I thought food was Amethyst’s thing,” Peridot scoffed.

“Mmmm, I’m thinking more along the lines of drinks,” Lapis replied.

“Water is your thing, after all.”

“Something stronger for this hellhole.” She started drifting towards the tables. “Well, see you later, nerd.”

"Wait,” Peridot stopped Lapis, grasping her hand. “You don’t want to be alone if you run into someone from your past.”

Lapis gave Peridot a soft smile. “Okay. But you should probably let go of my hand.”

A blush crawled on Peridot’s freckled face as she wrenched her hand away. Lapis’ laughs and snorts rang through the green-eyed girl’s ears.

Lapis sighed, laughter edging at the end of the exhale. Her content didn’t last long though, as her gaze drifted off and locked on two individuals in the small, growing crowd.

Peridot followed her eyes, landing on a pair of girls with dark blue hair laughing. It looked as if they were making snide comments on everyone, their sight targeting single characters and whispers quickly following. One had hair that curled and bobbed at her chin, while the other had a tiny ponytail peeking out from the back of her head. The former had their hands on their hips, eyes coy, while the latter had a splatter of freckles on their face, eyes closed as they giggled to whatever the other was saying.

“Are those…your cousins?” Peridot gasped.

Lapis clenched her fist. “In the flesh.”

“Maybe you should talk to them,” Peridot suggested, “You know, talk out your differences. Show them that you a—”

“No,” Lapis interrupted firmly. “We are going to avoid them.”

Peridot faltered. “Lapis, are you sure? You can’t just run away forever.”

Lapis swallowed, “I’ve been doing that my entire life.” The dark look on her face shot daggers into Peridot.

“If that’s what you want,” Peridot mumbled.

“Hey, these guys have high-quality drinks, right?” Lapis asked, changing the subject.

Peridot nodded. “I mean, I’m guessing.”

Lapis stopped. “Where do we stay for the night? I was going to ask earlier but forgot.”

The blonde thought for a moment. “I…have no idea. We should probably ask one of Amethyst’s cousins, they look like they know—”

“You can ask us,” a brazen voice cut in. Peridot whipped around, her face falling when she realized that it was the twins, Freckles and Curly.

Peridot shot a quick glance to Lapis, to make sure that the blue-eyed girl’s composure hadn’t failed. The only thing she found was a certain fire in Lapis’ eyes.

“What do you want?” she snapped.

Curly (Peridot assumed she was the one with the hair that curled at the end) stepped back. “Why, I thought it was _you_ who wanted to know what goes around here.” Her voice was snarky.

“Who’s this?” Freckles (Peridot assumed that was the one with pale freckles on her face) smirked. She stepped closer to Peridot, poking her fluffy hair.

“H-hey!” Peridot stepped back, a blush present on her face.

Curly slid behind Peridot. She hung her hands on Peridot’s shoulder, and despite herself, Peridot leaned into the touch. Freckles tipped the blonde’s chin towards her.

“Don’t touch her!” Lapis spat, trying to push Freckles away.

“Oh, is this your girlfriend? You have better taste than I thought!” Curly leered. She started twirling Peridot’s hair around her finger. “Still not amazing though…”

Tan skin tinted red, Lapis grasped her fingers tightly around Curly’s upper forearm, jerking it away.

Curly staggered back. “So you’re one of those clingy, overprotective ones, hm?”

Lapis ran her fingers through her hair. “Look, could you just leave us alone?” she breathed shakily. “Where are your dates, anyway?”

Freckles smirked. “Oh, those boys are probably off somewhere. We should probably get going, and leave these two alone.” she responded, a teasing lilt to her voice, booping Lapis on the nose. Curly turned away promptly, quickly followed by her sister.

“I hate them,” Lapis growled.

Peridot patted Lapis’ shoulder softly.

“Is that supposed to comfort me?” Lapis asked, quirking an eyebrow up.

“Does it do that?”

“…Maybe…” Lapis sighed, leaning into the touch.

“Then yes,” Peridot smiled. She paused before continuing, “Are you one?”

“Am I one what?”

“A, um, ‘clingy, overprotective’ girlfriend.” Peridot could already feel the blush painting her cheeks.

Lapis’ blinked, a smirk sprawling over her face. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“Oh, shut up, Lazuli!” Peridot retorted. She pushed her glasses up her nose. “I’m going to get something to eat.”

“Mkay,” Lapis started towards the drinks table.

“And _you’re_ coming with me,” Peridot said, gripping her roommate’s hands.

“Wh—hey!”

“You’re not twenty-one yet. I think they can recognize you, especially if Blue Diamond’s looking for you. You haven’t exactly changed much since high school, appearance-wise.”

“What do you mean? My hair’s, like, fifty shades darker.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “Ah, yes, my hair is a teeny bit less bright and a lot messier. What a difference.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Lapis grinned triumphantly. “It’s always been this messy.”

“Charming, really.”

“Surprised you think so,” Lapis smirked. “Then again…”

Peridot groaned. “If you want to flirt with someone, at least flirt with someone who doesn’t live with you.”

“That would be a lot easier,” Lapis grumbled, glancing at the drinks table , “if I could—”

“You’re coming with me,” Peridot finalized, pulling the blue-haired girl to the other side of the ballroom. “We are going to get something to eat.”

“Your word is my command,” Lapis smirked.

“ _Hopefully_ you’ll find someone there,” Peridot muttered.

Lapis shrugged, her lips pursed. “Yeah, I guess.”

Heaps of food were settled on the food table. Peridot glanced around, wide-eyed. “Wow…so many appetizers…”

“These are the appetizers?” Lapis blinked.

Peridot nodded. “Everyone eats together later…dig in, Lazuli,” she grinned.

The blunette rolled her eyes, reaching for a roll. Her gaze wandered to a tall boy leaning on the table a few feet away. He wasn’t with anyone else, and suddenly the smirk on Lapis’ face made a lot more sense to Peridot.

Lapis slunk closer to the boy, starting to chat with him. Peridot tried to ignore the churning inside her stomach. Where had that come from, anyway? The more Lapis talked to the boy, the stronger it got. The blonde could only hear snippets of their conversation:

“So, where are you from…”

“…I’m free…”

“You know what else can…?”

Lapis had gotten a hold of his tie, and was pulling him closer while also pushing him back.

Peridot had no idea why she did what she did, but the green-eyed girl shook the table a little. 

“Wh—hey!” the boy stumbled back. 

Lapis stepped away from him. “Are you okay?”

“You push too hard,” the boy grumbled. He got up. “I have a date, anyway. Where’s yours?”

Lapis glared at Peridot as the boy walked away. She mouthed, “You did that, didn’t you?”

Peridot shrugged, mouthing back, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I almost had him!” Lapis muttered as she walked to her roommate.

“I think you need to work on your flirting skills, Lazuli.”

“I swear, Peridot—”

“He’s another one of your one-night stands!”

“Yeah, well, I haven’t had one of those for at least a year and a half. Also, how the hell do you know about those?”

Peridot smirked. “Amethyst.”

“I’m going to kill her one day,” Lapis grumbled.

“I think you’ll be too late by then,” the blonde scoffed.

Lapis froze for a second, her mood dropped. She turned away, picking up another plate of food.

“Are you okay?” Peridot asked, touching her roommate’s shoulder.

“I’m fine,” Lapis answered, giving Peridot the fakest smile she could muster.

“Is this about your cousins?”

“No.”

“Blue Diamond?”

“No.”

“Jasper?”

“No—it’s nothing, Peridot, okay? And even if it was, I don’t always want to talk about it.”

Peridot slunk back in defeat.

The two of them stood in awkward silence for a few minutes, until the music changed to a slow waltz.

Lapis smiled at her roommate. “Care for a dance?” she asked, her hand out in front of her.

Peridot’s eyes widened. “I—oh. Um, sure.” The blonde placed her hand on top of Lapis’. Lapis responded by pulling both of them to the space in front of the tables.

 _Oh my stars, I’m really doing this,_ Peridot thought as Lapis rested her hands on top of Peridot’s waist. Peridot followed, looping her hands around Lapis’ neck.

“This is really uncomfortable,” Peridot grumbled a few minutes into the song.

“It’s not my fault you’re that short, gremlin.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. “Do you know how long they’re going to play this music?”

“You’re the mastermind,” Lapis giggled. “Shouldn’t you know?”

“I d-don’t know everything!” Peridot stuttered. Why was Lapis looking at her like that?

Suddenly, the music changed to a more livelier one. Lapis slid her hand to Peridot’s, and spun her around.

“Wh—Lapis!” Peridot choked out, still spinning. The backflips in her stomach were getting worse, and the dizziness was not helping.

Lapis stopped Peridot with a dip. Eyebrows raised, she smirked, “Yes, Peridot?”

A blush exploded on Peridot’s face. “Lazuli!”

Lapis snorted, pushing Peridot away. “I think that’s enough dancing for you. We don’t want you turning into a tomato. I think this ball is over, anyway.”

“But the eating!”

“Oh, yeah, the eating,” Lapis rolled her eyes. “Can we sit in the back? Away from the Diamonds?”

“Please,” Peridot replied wearily. “Over there, come on.”

The roommates found themselves on the far end of the table, close to the gates from which they had arrived. Lapis hummed quietly while waiting for her food, while Peridot recollected what she had to do the next day.

Lapis nudged the blonde’s shoulder. “Are you okay? You look like you’re…in a state of panic.”

“I—well…aren’t you? I mean, I guess _you_ don’t have to meet Yellow Diamond in a meeting. She’s my mom. Did I mention that I did the equivalent of flipping her off?”

“I can do that right now, so we can relate.”

“No! Just—I don’t know, it’s just the pressure. I have to meet her tomorrow, and there’s a meeting, and—it’s just _so much_!”

“Hey,” Lapis rested her hand on Peridot’s shoulder. “It’ll be okay.”

Peridot gulped away her worries with a, “I hope so,” since her platter had been filled with food. She ate it slowly and mindlessly, thinking about Yellow Diamond, and White Diamond, and the _future of Homeworld_ —

Peridot blinked. Her gaze had wandered to Lapis’ almost-full plate. “Aren’t you going to eat?” she questioned.

Lapis gave Peridot a tight smile. “I’m not that hungry.”

Peridot shrugged. “If you say so,” she responded, although she knew something was off.

“Esteemed guests!” A voice boomed from the front of the ballroom. A skinny blonde was the source of the voice. Her hair was pointed up, and there was an odd smirk on her face. Next to her was a quiet and similar figure, except she was slightly hunched and had powdery blue hair swept over her eyes. They looked like the personal servants the Diamonds had. Peridot had never gotten a good look at them. 

“Make way for Yellow Diamond!” the former servant continued.

Peridot winced as she saw her mother come into the scene. Tall and strong, quite the opposite of her daughter. Her blonde hair protruded forward, and an ever-lasting serious expression was on her face.

“And Blue Diamond!” the second servant added in her breathy voice.

“Oh, shit,” Lapis mumbled. “This’ll bring back memories. Can you do the patting thing you were doing earlier?”

Peridot raised an eyebrow. “I—sure? I’m surprised you find that comforting, given how much you hate people touching you and how annoying I am.”

“Oh, I don’t _always_ mind people touching me,” Lapis smirked. “And you’re still annoying.”

Peridot rolled her eyes. She glanced once at the front. Blue Diamond was willowy, just like her servant. She was a little far away, so Peridot couldn’t catch her details, but she didn’t look dangerous…physically, anyway.

 _Emotionally_ , on the other hand…

A final servant marched in between the two Diamonds. “White Diamond will not be joining us today,” she said, a creepy smile on her face.

Peridot and Lapis ate in silence, besides the few whispers from Lapis, making fun of how fancy everyone was.

“This place is reminding me too much of my childhood. My parents were into this kind of fancy shit.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I wonder if they’re here, or if they just sent my sisters. Cousins. It’s been fourteen years, and I still don’t know what to call those idiots.”

Lapis’ eyes kept darting towards Blue Diamond, and Peridot could hear her shiver. The blunette poked away most of her food, eating a small bite occasionally.

“Are you sick? You aren’t eating,” Peridot asked again.

“I’m fine, Peridot,” Lapis sighed.

* * *

“All right!” Yellow Diamond bellowed. Peridot jumped when she heard the cruel and familiar voice. “Everyone pack up and head to the designated room. If you don’t know which room to go to, come to either me or Blue’s Pearls!”

“Those must be the servants,” Peridot noted. “I’m guessing you don’t know where to go?” She looked at her “date”.

Lapis shook her head. “Let’s go to Yellow’s Pearl. I don’t want anything to do with Blue.”

Peridot shrugged, hiding her inner turmoil. “Yay,” she whispered humorlessly.

The two of them walked up to Yellow’s servant. She was grumbling under her breath, writing things down on a clipboard. “Yes—who are you?”

“Um, Peridot Diamond,” the green-eyed girl responded, her voice shaky. A surprised look took over Yellow Pearl. “And, er, this is Lapis Lazuli.”

“Is she your date?” Yellow Pearl asked, narrowing her eyes.

“Yes,” Peridot blushed, fidgeting.

“Very well. You two can sleep in room 1B.”

Lapis nodded, walking past the Pearl swiftly. Peridot followed her quickly, still nervous.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Lapis asked, a concerned look on her face.

“That was—I don’t know. It made me anxious.”

“I can tell,” Lapis smiled. “Come on, we have to go to 1B, right?”

“Yeah,” Peridot breathed. “We do. Down that corridor.”

The two of them started towards their room, not saying anything to each other.

“Wait,” Lapis stopped walking. “Do we…how many _beds_ are in that room?”

Peridot’s eyes widened. A blush dusted her face, and it felt like huge airplanes were flying inside her stomach. “Oh my _stars_ , ohmystarsohmystarsohmystars—I, er, think there's only one bed?”

“Oh.”

“It’ll be fine!” the blonde laughed nervously. “We’ll be fine. Just, um, sleep on the other side of the bed.”

“…Okay…”

Silently, Lapis walked into the dark room. She headed straight to the bathroom. “There are some spare clothes in here…what the hell, they have all sizes covered, even small gremlin size!”

“Shut up!” Peridot laughed, falling on to the bed. “You change first.”

Lapis was out of her suit and the bathroom quickly, while Peridot took a little longer getting out of her dress. They both situated on opposite sides of the bed, facing away from each other.

“We’re going to have to do this three more times,” Lapis groaned.

“I guess…” the blonde yawned. The backflips and airplanes in her stomach had subsided slightly, but they were still very present. “I’m going to sleep, Lazuli. You can stay awake and be an insomniac.”

Peridot didn’t need to turn around to know that Lapis was smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for not updating in a while!! i probably could've split this chapter up, but i like longer chapters better. feedback/comments are very appreciated :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot attends Yellow Diamond's meeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw for implied self-harm  
> tw for implied self-harm  
> tw for implied self-harm  
> tw for implied self-harm  
> tw for implied self-harm  
> tw for implied self-harm  
> tw for implied self-harm  
> please dont read the first part if that triggers you

When Peridot woke up, Lapis was not next to her.

Darkness engulfed the room. The blonde checked the time, which read 4:32 AM—the meeting wasn’t for a couple of hours. She scrambled upwards, trying to see if Lapis had left the bedroom for unknown reasons.

Peridot snapped her head towards the bathroom, hearing a voice coming from it. “Stupid…if Peridot sees you, you’re dead…you just  _ had _ to do this here…little piece of—”

“Lapis?” Peridot squeaked, crawling to the other side of the bed so she could look at the bathroom better. She heard something clatter to the floor.

“I—Peridot! You’re awake!” Lapis laughed nervously from the other side of the door.

“What are you doing in the bathroom? With the lights closed?”

Peridot heard Lapis gulp. “I didn’t want to, um, wake you up. But I guess I did that anyway!” The blunette muttered something incoherent to Peridot’s ears. The light flickered on.

Peridot blinked. “What was that noise?” she asked, slipping out of the bed and planting her wobbly feet on the floor.

“N-nothing! That was just…uh…a spare razor?” Lapis stammered.

“Why were you using a razor?” Peridot questioned, concern pooling in her voice.

“I wasn’t  _ using _ the r-razor! I just dropped it!”

“Lapis, unlock the door.”

The green-eyed girl heard water running. “Yeah, yeah, in a minute,” Lapis grumbled. A few seconds later, she opened the gate. “I swear, Peridot, you worry too much.”

The blonde narrowed her eyes. “Lapis, are you…okay?” 

“I’m fine,” Lapis answered, crawling back on to the bed, her arm hidden.

* * *

“Not packing any clothes was a smart idea,” Peridot muttered sarcastically. She pulled on the suit that was stashed in the drawers of the bathroom.

Heading out the door, the blonde looked at her roommate, who was hugging her knees to her chest. “Lapis, are you okay?”

Lapis’ eyes darted towards Peridot. “Of course I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be okay?”

Peridot pursed her lips. “Well…look, I don't know  _ what _ you were doing in that bathroom, but you know you can tell me anything, right?”

Lapis looked away. “Yeah, I know.”

Peridot furrowed her eyebrows, frowning. She adjusted the red bow tie she was wearing, then sighed, “I’m going, Lazuli.”

Lapis mustered a small smile. “You look nice.”

The shorter girl was glad that Lapis looked away again after that, for a blush had begun to bloom on Peridot’s face. She coughed into her fist, and then left the room.

As soon as her feet left the awkward air of the bedroom, realization hit Peridot in the face. She had to speak with her  _ mother _ , the one that she had called a  _ clod _ . Yellow Diamond would probably make her join Homeworld again.

And Peridot  _ really _ didn’t want to do that.

The green-eyed girl maneuvered through the confusing maze of hallways, soon finding someone else clad in a suit. Peridot guessed that they were a cousin of Amethyst’s—she looked very similar, but had a different shade of hair.

“Er, excuse me,” Peridot called out, hoping to catch the person’s attention.

The person turned around, blinking at Peridot. “Hi,” she greeted, a confused smile planted on her face.

“Where’s the…meeting going to be?”

“Oh! It’s this way,” she gestured in front of her. “You can call me Carnelian, by the way.”

“Peridot.”

A few minutes passed in awkward silence, until Peridot blurted out, “Are you Amethyst’s cousin?”

Carnelian grinned. “Yeah! She’s the only one shorter than me,” she responded, a proud tone to her voice. “You know her?”

Peridot nodded. “She’s my…friend.”

“Just friends, huh?” Carnelian smirked.

Peridot blushed. “I—um, well—how far is the meeting room?”

Carnelian laughed. “I’m just messing with you—although, Amethyst has said  _ quite  _ a lot about you. Anyway, it’s right over there,” she pointed over the corner. Peridot peeked past the turn, and saw a large metal door.

_ Who knows what’s past that. _

_ My future. _

_ Wait, that isn’t necessarily correct— _

_ Carnelian knows! I’ll just ask her. _

“Uh, are we late?” Peridot asked, glancing at her watch.

“We’re fine,” Carnelian mused. “Everyone else is just really early.”

“Oh,” Peridot fidgeted. “Shouldn’t  _ we  _ be early, then?”

“You don’t need to be stuck up for the Diamonds, you know.”

“My mother is a Diamond,” Peridot sighed.

Carnelian’s eyes widened. “Which one? Wait, let me guess, you’re the daughter of—”

“Yellow Diamond,” both called out at the same time.

Carnelian grinned. “Wow. Well, we don’t want to anger your mom, do we?”

“Believe me,” Peridot smiled, pushing the door open, “I’ve done that already.”

Inside was a long, gray, sharp-edged table, surrounded by chairs. Almost every chair had someone on top of it—and that the very end was Yellow Diamond herself.

Peridot gulped, slipping into a seat on the other side of the room. Carnelian headed towards someone who looked like yet another cousin of Amethyst’s.

_ How many cousins does she have? _

“I presume all of you know why you are here?” Yellow Diamond boomed.

An eruption of nods around the room. Peridot copied everyone else, cowering.

_ Ohmystarsohmystarsohmystars _ , Peridot thought, her mind an utter mess.  _ She hates me! Holy smokes, I’m dying today. _

“Homeworld is…a little  _ tight _ on money,” the Diamond continued.

_ Yeah, well, maybe you  _ wouldn’t _ be if you didn’t hold this extravagant ball. _

“I need  _ everyone  _ to put in their best effort,” Yellow’s eyes strayed towards Peridot, who resisted the urge to flinch at her mother’s gaze. “And everyone must be  _ focused _ on what  _ matters _ .”

Peridot slunk into her seat.

“Posture, young lady,” Yellow Diamond spat.

Peridot straightened her back. It was as if the strict woman had disowned her—Peridot wished her mother  _ had _ officially disowned her. At least then, she would never have to see her mother’s face again.

Yellow Diamond continued her speech. Peridot’s attention dipped in and out, and the blonde ended up only hearing snippets of the conversation. Something about getting more people into Homeworld…Peridot wasn't really sure if that would  _ help _ , per se, but there wasn't much she could do it.

“This meeting is over,” Yellow Diamond said in her commanding voice. “You may all leave. We’ll see you at the ball.”

Peridot scrambled up, trying to get out of the room as fast as she could.

“Peridot, wait.”

The blonde froze, slowly turning around to the source of the voice.

Yellow Diamond.

“I want to ask something special from you,” the green-eyed girl’s mother said. “Do you know of the court case… _Crystal Gems_ _vs. Homeworld_?”

Peridot shook her head.

A wary yet malicious smile found itself on Yellow Diamond’s face. “I see. It’s from a few years ago…an imbecile by the name of Rose Quartz challenged our work standards.”

_ Rose Quartz? _

_ As in, Steven’s mom?  _ The _ Rose Quartz? _

“Blue always said she looked familiar,” Yellow sighed. “Anyway, she…told some people to reopen the case right before she died. Garnet, Amethyst, and of course, a former Pearl from here. I have found out that they go to the same idiotic college that you attend. I would like you to gather information about them.”

Peridot gulped, slightly nodding.

_ I can’t do that! _

Yellow Diamond narrowed her eyes,“…they aren’t your  _ friends,  _ right?”

Peridot shook her head vigorously.

_ They are very much my friends! _

_ I can’t tell her! _

_ Oh stars, I’m lying to my mother! A Diamond, at that! _

“And that…Lapis Lazuli, right? Blue told me a little about her.”

_ Oh no. _

“You two aren’t  _ actually _ dating, are you?”

Peridot’s mind was in a frenzy. She blurted out the first thing that came to her, “Y-yes we are! And I think she can help me! She must know something!”

Yellow Diamond raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure?”

“I can ask her…she trusts me.”

_ I think. _

_ I hope. _

_ I’m not  _ actually _ going to ask. _

_ I wouldn’t do that. _

_ … _

_ Lapis does trust me, right? _

Yellow sighed. “If you say so. You’re dismissed.”

Peridot turned around. 

“And be careful,” her mother continued in a softer tone.

Peridot curled her fingers into a fist. “I…I will.” 

* * *

“You’re ready early,” Peridot noted, sliding into the bedroom. “The ball isn’t for another hour.”

Lapis shrugged. “Doesn’t hurt getting ready early,” she responded, tugging the sleeve of her suit down.

Peridot narrowed her eyes. “Okay…should I wear the dress or just stay in this suit?”

“Does it  _ matter _ ?” Lapis grunted.

The blonde stomped up to her taller roommate, resting her hands on each shoulder. “Are you alright?”

Lapis’ gaze slipped down. “ _ I don’t know Peridot _ ,” she whispered in a shaky voice.

Peridot’s expression softened. “Do you want to skip the ball and just go home?”

“We can  _ do _ that?”

“The meeting’s over…and, well, I think I accidentally befriended the guards.”

Lapis smirked. “Let’s get out of here. I’ll call Garnet.”

Peridot smiled. She was done with this place, and couldn’t stand looking at her mother’s face again for the rest of the day. The green-eyed girl changed into her dress, having nothing else to wear back to the university.

Peridot heard Lapis cut the phone. “Uh…Garnet’s already coming. She ‘predicted’ that we would be going back early.”

Peridot raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Yeah. She’s coming here in fifteen minutes. You can tell me what happened at your meeting in the meantime.”

Peridot froze. “I—oh. Um…I wasn’t…paying attention?”

Lapis blinked. “How were  _ you _ not paying attention? And why were you so nervous when you came in?”

_ Was it that obvious? _ Peridot thought. “I paid attention a little. They want to hire more people, that’s it.”

“Did Yellow Diamond directly say something to you?” Lapis asked, stepping closer.

“N-no,” Peridot lied. “Not yet, anyway.”

_ I can’t tell her. _

_ I can’t use her. _

_ I’ll tell her later. _

Lapis narrowed her eyes. “Whatever. We should wait by the curb.”

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

* * *

“Amethyst!” Peridot grinned, running up to hug her friend. “I’ve missed you.”

“Oh, really?” Amethyst smirked, pulling back. A slight blush was visible on her cheeks. “Is that why you’re meeting me  _ two days _ after the ball?”

“I was tired on Sunday! And I was busy yesterday,” huffed Peridot.

“I’m just kidding. How was it?”

“It was okay. I met your cousins. Exactly  _ how _ many do you have?”

“ _ Too _ many.”

Peridot giggled, sitting down on the couch. Steven hummed quietly in the corner, whipping up what looked like a stack of pancakes.

“Why are you making breakfast?” asked Peridot a few minutes later, “It’s seven o’ clock in the evening.”

Steven shrugged. “This is a Together Breakfast,” he explained, “which you eat with other people.” He sprinkled some popcorn on top of the stack.

Peridot stared at the concoction, a look of amazement, confusion, and disgust on her face. “I—okay. Sure.”

“Do you want some?” Steven asked cheerily. 

Peridot grimaced. “Er, no thanks. I should probably get going, anyway.”

“Aw, man! You just got here!” Amethyst complained.

Peridot rolled her eyes. “I just wanted to meet you. You have  _ no _ idea how hard it is, spending a whole day with Lazuli.”

Amethyst giggled. “I see.”

“Well, I’m going,” Peridot waved, opening the door.

“Bye!” Amethyst and Steven called out at the same time.

Peridot smiled, closing the door behind her. Today was a good day. Nothing could ruin it. She sighed, hitting the sandy beach and turning around to look at the moon.

Instead, she saw her roommate, Lapis Lazuli, standing on the edge of a cliff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the kind of short chapter that doesnt make sense


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis is confronted by Peridot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw for suicidal attempt/toxic relationships/mentioned attempt at drowning someone  
> tw for suicidal attempt/toxic relationships/mentioned attempt at drowning someone  
> tw for suicidal attempt/toxic relationships/mentioned attempt at drowning someone  
> tw for suicidal attempt/toxic relationships/mentioned attempt at drowning someone  
> this chapter is from lapis' view

Lapis was so _done_.

She hated feeling the way she was feeling, but she _deserved_ it, after what she did with Jasper.

Guilt welled up inside her as she crossed through the grassy cliff. The blue-haired girl could see the dark barn in the distance, ominously sitting there. A shudder racked through her, but Lapis pushed forward, hugging herself tightly. She was going through with this.

 _Somehow_ her roommate hadn’t noticed. Not once had Peridot questioned her actions; or at least, the blonde had never thought she was going to…do what she was about to do. The only exception had been her stupid slip-up in the bathroom. Peridot had looked concerned, but she hadn't questioned Lapis. She hadn’t pestered Lapis. Lapis didn’t want to talk about it, and Peridot respected that.

Lapis almost wished she didn’t.

If Peridot _had_ bugged Lapis about it…

 _Would I still be here?_ Lapis thought, pausing for a second. She looked back. _Is this the right choice?_

_Of course it is. You’ve already hurt enough people._

Lapis started walking again, faster than before.

She froze near the end of the cliff, peering into the ocean.

_“Jasper, we can’t do this anymore.”_

Her breath hitched, more memories pounding into her.

_“What do you mean? We’re so powerful together!”_

_“Jasper, we both hate each other.”_

_“Why are we together, then?”_

_“You tell me!”_

Lapis gulped. Her hands started shaking, realization of what she was about to do swarming in her mind.

_“Fine! I had to, okay, Lapis? You know my family works for Homeworld! Blue Diamond told me to! She’s the only one who cares about Pi—”_

_“_ Blue _Diamond? You work for Blue Diamond?”_

_“No, I used to work for Pink, and now I work for Yellow! Her and Blue were just talki—”_

_“Jasper, I’m hurting you! And you’re hurting me! Why don’t you understand?”_

_“Maybe I should be hurt!”_

_“Jaspe—”_

_“Stop stepping towards the ocean!”_

_“Stop stepping towards me!”_

Lapis stepped back instinctively. The grass brushing against her foot reminded her too well of the ocean waves that had lapped around her ankles.

_“Lapis!”_

_“You might’ve forced me to stop going to swim meets, but I’m still my best near water!”_

_“Lapis, this is dangerous!”_

_“I know how to swim!”_

The blue-eyed freshmen remembered the way Jasper had grabbed her shoulders, trying to stop her.

_“Lapis!”_

_“Let me go! You can’t chain me in any longer!”_

_“We’re_ better _together, Lapis!”_

Her eyes widened as she recalled how she had grabbed Jasper’s shoulders in return…and had pushed her back towards the ocean.

_“Lapis what the fu—I can’t breathe!”_

The sound of Jasper’s breathless gasps filled the blunette’s ears. Lapis was tormented by the horrified expression on the large blonde, the way her amber eyes had widened, the fact that Lapis had never seen her _scared_ before, and now Jasper was scared because of _her_.

It was too much. Lapis had done too much. She didn’t want to hurt anyone else.

 _Wouldn’t dying hurt other people?_ Lapis thought momentarily. _Does anyone care that much?_

Her mind immediately flashed to Peridot.

_It’ll be fine._

_…_

_I’m not being selfish, right?_

Lapis leaned closer to the edge. If she hesitated any longer…what if she started regretting it? That wouldn't be good.

 _I just_ had _to choose the most painful way._

_I deserve it._

Lapis blinked, taking in the world for the last time. A sigh racked through her as she tugged on the edge of her large, dark blue sweatshirt, and she—

“Lapis!”

The blunette’s eyes widened. Her head whipped around faster than a train car. “P-Peridot? What are you doing here?”

The blonde paused, hands on her knees, huffing. “Lapis, what the hell are you doing?” she cried out after a moment.

“Oh, no, no, no…” Lapis mumbled. She had waited too long. She couldn't just jump in front of her roommate. The blue-eyed girl turned back, hugging herself again.

“Lapis!”

“Wh-what?”

“What are you—why are you here?”

“Why do you _think_ I’m here?” Lapis snapped, still facing the ocean. She heard Peridot scamper closer to her.

“Lapis, please, don’t do it,” Peridot responded, her voice shaking. “Please…”

The blue-haired girl ran her hand through her hair roughly, Jasper’s terrified eyes filling her thoughts. “Why shouldn’t I?” she laughed darkly. “I only hurt people. I don't deserve to live.”

Lapis felt arms around her, and heard the blonde falling on to her knees. The blunette stood stiff, not reacting.

“Lapis, people can change,” Peridot whispered against the back of her hoodie. “ _You_ can change!”

“I don’t want to hurt anyone else,” Lapis replied hoarsely. She felt herself spiraling downwards, tears slipping down her cheeks silently. _I’ve already hurt Jasper. I don't want to hurt_ you _, Peridot._

“Lapis, it’ll be fi—”

“No one cares enough for it to be fine. If I jump, it won’t matter.”

“I care, Lapis! I care!”

“Y-you're just saying that,” Lapis whispered, feeling herself falling. Her knees hit the grass with a _thud_.

“No, I’m not,” Peridot answered. “There are people that _care_ about you, and—”

“You’re just _saying_ that!” Lapis retorted. “No one cares about me! Do you ever see Bismuth, or Pearl, or Garnet, or even Amethyst— _anyone—_ talking to me without you or Steven being there?” She gritted her teeth, “If they ever try to _help_ me, I push them away! I’ve always done that and—I don’t want to hurt anyone else. This is the only solution!”

“No it’s not!” Peridot cried. “Why didn’t you t-tell me? I could’ve helped!”

The tears started running down Lapis’ face faster. “I…I don’t know, Peridot.”

The green-eyed girl sniffed, getting up. “Can we just—can we just go back to the dorm? You can talk to Garnet tomorrow.”

“That’s it?” Lapis stood up, still wobbly on her feet. “If I jumped off _right now_ —”

“Lapis, please,” Peridot interrupted shakily. “I care about you, and I—please don't jump. Please, Lapis—y-you should get some sleep. You’re tired, and… _please_ don't jump.”

Blue eyes locked with green ones. Lapis saw the concern, the fear, the care in Peridot’s eyes.

_I’m going to hurt her somehow._

_I—Peridot’s going to be hurt. Because of_ me _._

The taller girl stumbled into the blonde’s arms, who steadied her slowly. “Lapis. Lapis, listen to me,” Peridot whispered.

The blunette peered into her roommate’s eyes, her gaze unfocused. “I’m sorry, Peridot,” she responded in a low voice.

Peridot bit her lip. “Let’s go. It’s late—you might catch a cold. Come on.” She gently pulled on her roommate.

“I’m sorry,” Lapis murmured again, following the blonde silently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for not updating :(  
> thank you _so_ much for 100 kudos- when i started this i thought it would end with like fifty or something kjsdfhkd
> 
> this chapter got way too personal i dont think lapis even has these problems but im not rewriting it  
> also im really sorry if i sounded like a lapis apologist, i tried making it her fault
> 
> the chapters are probably going to get a lot shorter (this one was half as long as a normal one) and take longer to update because i dont have any motivation left for this shitty fanfiction


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath and Amethyst exists part two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> amethyst sweetie im so sorry

“Lapis,” Peridot sighed, resting her hands on her roommate’s shoulders, pushing her deeper on to her bed. “Are you okay?”

“No,” Lapis muttered. “Do I  _ look  _ okay?”

Peridot crossed her arms. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

Pressing the bridge of her nose, the blonde continued, “Lapis, you need help. Garnet’s going to talk to you tomorrow.”

“Stop talking to me like I’m a kid!” the blue-haired girl snapped. “I’m not! I’m old enough to know what to do—to make the right decisions!”

“Lapis, you were about to jump off a cliff!” Peridot yelled.

“Yeah, so? Maybe that’s the best decision!”

* * *

“No it isn’t, Lapis! Taking your life is never the best decision!”

Lapis stood up suddenly. “What do you know? You’ve never been in the position I’m in!”

Peridot stepped back. “Can we just—can we just go to sleep?” she sighed, hoping she didn’t sound condescending.

“Fine,” Lapis turned around.

“Wait,” the blonde stepped towards Lapis. “Let me see your arm.”

“No,” Lapis answered darkly.

“ _ Lapis _ , let me see your arm.”

The blunette frowned, but obliged. “Here.”

Peridot’s eyes widened. Scars criss-crossed on her roommate’s wrist, all the way to her pushed-up sleeve. “What the hell, Lapis? Are you—why didn’t you talk to me?”

“You can’t solve every problem!” Lapis answered, pulling her hand away.

Peridot sighed. “Let’s just—we’re going to talk about this in the morning, okay?”

“Whatever.”

Peridot pushed her blanket roughly, tucking herself in. She fell asleep to the soft hum of the air conditioner.

* * *

The blonde sat up, eyes blurry. She whipped her head around at the sound of sniffling.

“L-Lapis?” she edged out of her bed, picking her glasses up and smashing them on to her nose. “Are you okay?”

The blue-haired freshman was curled up into a ball tightly, facing the wall while gripping her wrist with one hand and pulling her hair with her other.

“Lapis!” Peridot rushed over, kneeling at the edge of her bed. She hesitated, not sure if she should touch her roommate or not. “...Lapis, wake up!” she whispered loudly, keeping her hands to herself.

Lapis’ eyes flew open. A gasp escaped from her lips—she shuddered and sat up. “Peridot?”

“I’m here,” the blonde said, standing up and leaning closer. “Are you okay? You were—what were you dreaming of?”

“Jasper,” Lapis responded shakily. Her hand fell on the other’s, making Peridot’s heat flutter. “I—I almost  _ killed  _ her, Peridot.  _ I almost killed her _ .”

“Um,” Peridot blinked, at a loss of words.  _ How am I supposed to respond to that? _ She fixed her glasses. “But you didn’t,” she offered as comfort.

“The only reason I  _ didn’t _ was because of Steven,” the blunette answered angrily.

“ _ What _ ?!” Peridot yelped, jumping up. “ _ Steven  _ was there?!”

“Yes, and he—he looked at me, and told me to stop—and Jasper’s eyes—I almost killed her! Why can’t you see that—there’s something wrong with me!”

Peridot took a deep breath. “Look, I—people can change, okay? And you were just in the heat of the moment. She—how was she? With you?”

“It kinda sucked,” Lapis grumbled. “We were…we argued all the time. She said she felt  _ powerful  _ with me. I was—I was  _ manipulating  _ her. Making her feel powerless. This is all  _ my  _ fault.”

“I’m pretty sure those mean different things,” Peridot sighed. “Do you want to go to sleep again?”

“Yeah,” Lapis muttered, laying back down on her side and pulling her blanket up. “Good night.”

“G-good night,” the green-eyed freshman nodded, gulping.

* * *

“Hey, P-dot?”

“Yes, Amethyst?” Peridot deadpanned, stuffing food into her mouth.

There was a pause on the other end of the line. “I…I need to…I need to tell you something. Can I come over?”

“Sure. When are you going to—”

“Now. Bye.”

“I—” Peridot looked at her phone. Amethyst had cut the call. “—okay, then,” she quirked an eyebrow up.

Lapis stretched her hands up tiredly, the hem of her t-shirt raising slightly. “Ame’s coming over?” she asked, half-awake.

“Yeah,” Peridot nodded, a light blush on her cheeks.

“Cool,” the blunette blue-eyed girl fell into her bed again, turning her phone out and scrolling through it.

Peridot sighed, her mind wandering. What did Amethyst need to say that she couldn’t ask the blonde over the phone? Why did she sound so nervous?

“What day of the week is it?” Lapis murmured, not looking up from her phone.

“Friday,” Peridot answered.

Her roommate groaned. “We have that stupid ball tomorrow.”

The blonde’s eyes widened, remembering her mother’s request. “Oh, r-right,” she stuttered nervously. “Hey, um, Lapis?”

“Yeah?” the blunette replied, clearly still bored.

“I—”

_ Knock, knock. _

Peridot leaped off her bed, stumbling to the door. It swung open to reveal none other than Amethyst herself.

“Amethyst!”

“Peridot.”

They both blurted out each other’s name at the same time.

Peridot smiled. “So, why’d you come?”

Amethyst took a deep breath. “I—I need to ask you something.”

The blonde frowned. “Are you okay?”

“Peridot,” the Latina grabbed her friend’s hand. “I  _ really  _ like you. Like—you know how I said I liked Pearl? I—that much. She’s with Bismuth now, they’re officially together—”

“What?” Lapis squeaked from the background.

Amethyst continued, “—and—I really like you, Peri. Will you…y’know…?”

“Uh,” Peridot gaped, stepping back. “Well, er,” she truly didn’t know how to respond. Yes, she liked Amethyst—maybe even in the way that she was implying. But something was  _ stopping  _ her.

She could feel Lapis’ gaze boring into her back.

A sigh escaped from her lips. “Amethyst, I’m…I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Huh?” the small smile fell from the lilac-haired girl’s face.

“Sorry,” Peridot pursed her lips. “But…I don’t feel the same. I like us as friends. Just friends.”

“Oh,” Amethyst’s shoulders sulked. “Um, we’re still going to be…friends, right?”

“Yeah, of course!” the blonde gave her a weak grin.

“Okay,” the other responded quietly. “Bye.”

“Bye.”

The door closed with a  _ thud _ .

“Was that the right decision?” Peridot fretted immediately, turning around to face her roommate.

“It’s your love life,” she grumbled, turning away, her arms crossed. “If what you said was right, then yeah. I guess. It doesn’t matter to me.”

Peridot huffed, stomping to her bed. “Okay,” she sat on top of her bed harshly.

“So,” the blunette peeked at her roommate. “What were you going to say before?”

The blonde froze. “I…uh…how was your talk with Garnet?” she blurted out. She’d been meaning to ask for a while, but never got the chance to bring it up.

Lapis shrugged. “I dunno. We just talked.”

“Did you talk about…the J-word?”

The blue-haired girl rolled her eyes. “No. I didn’t want to, so we didn’t.”

“Oh. Okay. Did it…help?”

Lapis fidgeted with the edge of her t-shirt. “I’m not sure. We didn’t really talk about anything that important. I think she was warming up to me or something.”

“Oh. Maybe next week.”

“ _ Next week _ ?”

“Yeah. Next Wednesday.”

Lapis groaned, falling back on to her bed. “I have to do that  _ again _ ?”

“I thought you liked Garnet!” Peridot retorted.

“She’s not bad! She’s just so…distant. I barely know her! Or any of them, for that matter, besides Steven, and you, and maybe Ameth—”

“Are you sure I made the right decision?”

Lapis looked away quickly. “Um, yeah. I don’t exactly have the best relationship experience, you know, but—Ame’s nice. Not like her sister. But if you don’t like her—”

“It didn’t feel right,” Peridot sighed. “I dunno…almost as if…she’s not the person I like the most.”

Lapis raised an eyebrow. “So…you have a crush on someone?”

“I don’t know!” Peridot stood up. She groaned, crashing into her bed again. “I don’t know,” she repeated softly.

“Was that it?” Lapis stood up, glancing at her phone a final time. “I need to get to class.”

Peridot blinked. “Well, um,” she rolled over.

_ Do I want to drag her into this? _

“It’s nothing,” she waved dismissively. “You can go. I mean, if you want.”

“Right,” Lapis raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

“Right,” Peridot sighed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> making this a lapithyst story brb /j
> 
> idk how asking someone out/liking someone works so...we're going to pretend this is how it works  
> i dont even like lapidot anymore lmfao i dont know why i decided to add a weird love triangle plot into this bc those suck but i already implied ame liked peri so too late now  
> ship lapamedot, that way everyone can be happy
> 
> if the first and second part dont line up its bc i wrote them one and half weeks apart so of course they dont shut up


End file.
